clownery

its the no notes ghoast

tumblr’s code may change but no notes ghost stays the same

Oh thank god

imagine the shit storm when tumblr finally becomes so dysfunctional that this post’s total notes is finally revealed

date of origin: unknown

Just discovered that my local cat cafe hired my ex. Worst day of my life

society if comics remembered that despite their stupid hero/villain dichotomy literally every superhero is 100% a criminal... like. they don’t have permission to do the shit they do.

every time a superhero tries to pull moral high ground above ANYONE using law or legality or any law enforcement agency i get so mad like SO mad. realistically there is nothing separating you from these people on a legal standpoint. you HAVE to recognize that crime is a social construct (but hurting people—and helping them—is not) in order to be a compelling superhero writer IMO. instead they write weird shit like “if you have an FBI file on you you’re a bad person” as if any well known LITERAL VIGILANTE wouldn’t realistically have their own FBI file a mile long

“im better than you because i’m not a criminal” CRINGE. YOU LITERALLY ARE. “i’m not inherently better than you and you’re not inherently worse than me. you choose to hurt people, though, and i choose to help them” im kissing you on the mouth

if your only exposure to superheroes is the mcu then this post is NOT for you. die

The only thing worse than a superhero with a superiority complex is a superhero with a superiority complex that is also sanctioned by the US government.

today i want to thank higashikata josuke for doing what's right and starting the revolution that secured jojo's rights to bottoming

I saw an instagram post the other day that was like ‘things that cause an asymmetrical face’ and all the things were like ‘leaning your head on your hand’ ‘sleeping on one side’ ‘smirking’ ‘always holding your phone in the same hand’ and it’s just like. Like god it must be EXHAUSTING micromanaging yourself like that. Maybe we’re all doomed to having asymmetrical faces unless we constantly monitor ourselves and hold our phones in our non dominant hands and set alarms so we can make sure to turn around in the middle of the night because god forbids we sleep on one side for too long or maybe MAYBE having an asymmetrical face is fine. Maybe it’s just fine. And normal. Maybe we need to stop worrying so goddamn much about our faces and just live our lives.

i got one of those self cleaning litter boxes a few months ago and while Yoohoo is pretty good at using it he does NOT like the sound the poop rake makes when it moves. now the thing about this litterbox is that it can detect movement and won’t activate itself until about ten minutes after the cat has vacated it. yoohoo has apparently figured out that if he makes a huge vaguely cat sized pile of litter right in the middle he can fool the litterbox into thinking it is still occupied and the poop rake will never activate. this is the third time i have had to destroy his carefully constructed poop decoy and i would officially like to trade in my cat for an otherwise identical but noticeably stupider one, incapable of pulling these ferris beuller shenanigans on me each morning

Do you ever get a wave of nostalgia for a hyperfixation that’s never coming back with the same sort of melancholy with which you mourn a lost childhood friend

Like “you consumed my every waking moment for six entire months, and now I haven’t thought about you in years…I miss that passion”

*looks at sherlock* it’s very smoll

oh my god it was me

this is the very first ever documented use of smoll. you’re all a witness to language history here.

the damage you have done to society