Andraste's dimpled buttcheeks!

Having someone ask ChatGPT in a meeting is like being a grown-ass professional adult in a room full of other grown-ass professional adults trying to solve a problem, while a colleague with one of those baby toys that makes animal sounds repeatedly presses the cow button. And we all have to stop what we're doing and listen to cow go moo and say "wow hm yeah that's not really what we're asking but the cow does definitely go moo, good thoughts"

Except increasingly the cow is being treated as a respected contributor to meetings as we pivot to a moo-centric business model that principally produces bullshit

Old dude came in the shop and when I said "lemme know if you have any questions" he goes "what was the name of Alexander the Great's horse," thinking he was so funny. I told him Bucephalus, and he was so disappointed. Like his whole day was hanging on beating me at trivia. He says "you're only the second person who knew that" and I said "well, probably the third if you count Alexander the Great." He left without buying anything, and did not say goodbye. I think I honestly hurt his weird little feelings! Sorry I'm a bitch, old man!

I had one of these once, bookshop customer randomly challenged me to name, quote, ‘the only word in English where two u’s are next to each other’, and when I immediately said ‘vacuum’ he looked disappointed and when I pointed out it isn’t even the only word with two u’s next to each other in English and offered ‘continuum’ as an example he looked like I’d just punched his ribcage out his back like a Mortal Kombat character

People claiming this didn’t happen have never worked a day in retail

something about me is that i can never enjoy a car scene where the driver takes their eyes off the road for more than 2 seconds. due to the disturbing lack of road safety ofc and not because im so very scared because what if somerhing bad happen ogh god please look at the road

Mutuals can have my home address before discord can have my ID

i got bit by a snake! quick!! you have to jerk me off to get the poison out! and pinch my nipples a little, too. and call me good boy! yeah that’s the only antidote I looked it up on Internet Explorerrrrrrr

i didn’t post this. i was hacked and this is all they posted #promise

can you tell the hacker to come back

Yeah, so, "TikTok is officially under the control of a cadre of pro-Trump billionaires including Larry Ellison."

gothic horror is when there's a location. cosmic horror is when there's an unauthorized fucking Thing. folk horror is when you're outside.

my favourite thing is that everyone unanimously said “this post is about people in my life who use chatgpt”

FIRST step to enjoying any media is getting attached to the character whose suicidal tendencies are the most obvious

Second step is shipping them with whoever they are most likely to become codependent with.