Nage

I just remembered how hilarious it was to watch this shit on national television.

remember when we thought THIS was wild

When you’re trying to give your mom a heart attack

i always thought of a king sized bed as being a bit bigger than a queen, but now that i have one, i can tell you that a king sized bed is an absurdity. i can sprawl out, and my husband can sprawl out, and the cat can sprawl out, and none of us are touching. i reach out in the night, and find only pillows and plush walruses. i reach further and eventually find his elbow. he rolls over the comforters to try and find me. “i have crossed oceans of bed to be with you,” he says. there is a vast expanse of bed untouched, unmapped, unexplored. the cat is still trying to sleep on my face.

This is the opposite of a creepypasta

Uhm what is that it’s huge?

Issa sea tortoise, like the ones that can live to around 500 years old. They’re capable of getting quite large from what I gather.

A big boy!

Liquid J is now a genderfluid deity that can manifest any form to influence the mortals they want to help.