Numb

Finding one’s self

Yet still feeling completely

Alone

This world may have its beauty

But I find the darkness

I crash

It’s natural and yet

Any time I feel I make one step forward

I fall down another fucking hole

I’m starting to wonder if

Maybe

I will have the happy

Picture perfect

Family

With the children running around

And my partner smiling

With the sun drenching us all

In a perfect framed memory

Though that is a long was away

I stop writing

Because then

On that day

My worries

My thoughts

My breath

When will I be happy

Who will I have become if I find nothing

How long must I wait

Why must I crave something that will never come

And yet I can’t find the escape

Physical or not

Where did our souls go

While I sit and dream of many lives

Who am I

Though I never get to

Who am I

To be what you want

What will it take

To finally feel free