it is impossible to watch a movie. every night i think i want to watch a movie. no movie gets watched. because it's not possible

and yet they keep making movies with the hopes that one day humanity will discover a way to watch them. it's so inspiring

As a kid, I wasn’t allowed to touch the hot stove with my bare hands. But now I get to do it whenever I want

what do red pandas even do

If any competition needed to be on Tumblr, it's this one.

you should get a second evening for reading fan fiction. And you should get an extra day in the week to do arts and crafts.

btw it's so fucking stupid you can be anxious physically in your body even after you've decided mentally you don't care. I'm supposed to be in charge here

You can lie when you name things

the second eel at the end in its little cuck shelter 💜

scientists are experimenting on cross-breeding a crab and a cheetah; things could go sideways real fast

im not a girl Unless ☝️ im being told to go piss