Formaldehyde

Then when bisexuals spoke up and were like "hey we actually do experience homophobia because we are often perceived as queer. Also I'm really uncomfortable with how I'm being treated in my own community" but I responded by spouting statistics about corrective rape and violence against lesbians (despite the fact they never denied the suffering of lesbians), while ignoring their actual objection, we could agree that would be a horrible and biphobic thing to do?

My poor baby… locking up afterwards doesn’t make up for breaking in in the first place.

I think that the Kaiba brothers’ grasp of the law goes something like this:

LEGAL: Stuff you can do, no problem.

ILLEGAL: Stuff that takes a little more time, money and effort to get done.

There are many scripts online you can follow, many ways to tweak your message to fit your senator (ESPECIALLY if they are up for reelection this year). Whether it's a recording you reach or a real person, be straightforward, don't argue, just let your rep know that you are a constituent and you oppose the KIDS act, etc.

A transmasc posted about how transmascs and trans men are often invisible, how our issues are dismissed, and how resources, especially medical ones, are almost always written with non transmascs in mind. They posted this both to r/Trans and r/lgbt.

A moderator of r/Trans responded by telling them to “stop bitching.” That’s the word they used. That’s the level of respect trans men get. Transandrophobic by the way, don't call trans men bitches.

The comment was deleted, quietly, after backlash. Then the entire post was removed. When asked why, a mod responded that the post was “playing oppression olympics,” and took the time to go through and dismiss each of the original poster’s points, including saying that trans men being sexually assaulted isn’t “unique to transmascs” and therefore not an issue, and claiming that access to testosterone isn’t any more restricted than access to estrogen, which is a straight-up lie, because T is a tightly controlled substance in most places and E is not.

The original poster was banned for three days.

Then a separate mod made a post saying, “nobody asked us our side of the story,” which is wild because people absolutely did, publicly and repeatedly. Users also started reporting that they’d had supportive comments removed or had been banned after disagreeing with the mods, some of those claims are still unconfirmed, but given the general behavior, it wouldn’t be surprising.

Then r/Trans locked down entirely. No new posts. The conversation was forcibly ended.

Some people posted about it on r/FTM, many of those posts were mass-reported, automatically removed by Reddit’s automod, or quietly buried. Meanwhile, r/lgbt also removed the original post, with no explanation.

One of the r/Trans mods eventually posted an “apology,” which was really just a soft-scrubbed PR post full of noncommittal language and distancing. They said they didn’t mean to call a trans man “a bitch,” they just used it synonymously with “complaining,” and they didn’t think about the implications until later even though the first post was about microaggressions just like the mod committed. They did not apologize for anything else, not for wrongfully banning people, not for accusing a transmasc venting like any other user of playing oppression olympics, nothing at all. They said they’re on break and can’t do anything about it. They said, and I quote, “please don’t be mad at the rest of the team.” even though the rest of the team are just as culpable for not stopping their behavior.

They also added that trans men are “a welcome part of the community” and tried to point at moderation history as proof. Because apparently we should be grateful that people occasionally get banned, every so often, for implying trans men aren't oppressed at all, wow, thanks, that is like below the bare minimum, cool.

The current state of things is: r/Trans has over 600,000 members, and trans men and transmascs were silenced, banned, and told to shut up for bringing up their own oppression. And the subreddit is locked down. There’s a mass exodus happening to the new sub, r/trans4every1, but let’s be real, the damage has already been done.

Now let’s talk about what this actually means.

This is not “just more Tumblr discourse.” This isn’t some random blog saying they don’t like transmascs. This isn’t a Twitter reply guy. This isn’t a niche zine or a spicy personal take. This is a massive trans-focused subreddit with over half a million users. It's easily one of the largest public facing trans community online, maybe even the largest, I've certainly never found a bigger one myself. And the moderation team made it crystal clear: they do not want transmascs to feel safe or welcome there.

This is what transandrophobia looks like on a slightly larger internet scale. When it’s in the hands of people who get to decide who gets heard and who gets deleted.

And for anyone who’s still stuck on “well they apologized” listen: trans men are told all the time that we’re being too loud, too angry, too entitled, too manly, too feminine, too confusing, too “binary,” too "Nonbinary", too much. We’re told that we’re “oppression olympics-ing” just for talking about our lives. And now we're getting banned and locked out of the spaces that claim to represent a huge portion of online trans people.

This isn't just online drama. This is a bellwether. And if it isn’t setting off alarms in your head, it should be.

The way transandrophobia manifests in online spaces absolutely bleeds into real life, into medical gatekeeping, into poor data collection, into the erasure of sexual violence against transmascs, into advocacy groups that write us out of the picture, into educational materials that treat us like footnotes, if they include us at all.

And if you’re sitting there thinking, “well it’s not that deep,” you’re part of the problem.

We need to start being more honest about this: Transandrophobia is real, it is widespread, and it is growing. We need to stop giving people the benefit of the doubt when they’ve shown us they don’t want us in the room.

And frankly?

We need to start making TRFs [Trans Radfems & transmasc-exclusionary feminists alike] deeply uncomfortable being open about their beliefs. We need to make them afraid to be TRFs, the way they’re trying to make us afraid to exist.

The same way we don’t coddle fascists. The same way we don’t tolerate TERFs. We need to stop tiptoeing around transandrophobia.

Because this growing wave of transandrophobia is going to kill people. Full stop.

Protect trans men. Protect transmascs. Protect your siblings; all of them!

Edit because I forgot to add it:

Another thing worth noting is that not only was r/trans deleting and banning any users and posts talking about the situation, they were deleting any posts talking about transmasc issues or transmasc positivity full stop.

WORMY i got u........

And suddenly, there was a hand in his hair. It was an unceremonious motion. It wasn't in the dark. He had been at the desk in his room, his best friend standing beside him as he showed him his newest little trinket. A tiny figure for a small, niche collectables series. More often than not, Yugi heavily disliked--to say the least--when people pat his head or rest their hands on his hair. Most always feels like he's being mad fun of. Of course, currently it was different. Currently, his best friend was the one who's hand was planted in his hair. His best friends big, scar littered and somewhat rough hand now running through the strands. Yugi sat a little straighter, lightly tiling his head into Joey's touch as the blonde chuckled. "Shit, Yuugs, hadn't realized yer hair'd be so soft." Had been the words that left the tallers lips, a smile in his voice. They were words that made Yugi more than glad he actually took the time to wash his hair for the first time in a while. He had been bored, he wasn't tired and he wasn't in the mood for any of his handhelds. He wasn't in the mood for TV and preferred his music far too loud for what time it was, so he dragged himself to the bathroom, washed the makeup off his face and washed his hair. Never in Yugi's life did he think he'd be grateful for past boredom but of course there's a first time for everything. A content sigh escaped him as he leaned further into Joey's touch. Oh, Yugi wished they were on his bed so he could be closer. This just wasn't enough. And the moment he felt blunt nails lightly scratch at his scalp, Yugi knew he was a goner. It felt good. More than 'good'. Amazing. Wonderful. It was a high he now felt the need to chase. Deep down Yugi knows it isn't just the physical feeling that's got him feeling so drunk. It's the attention. The affection. Distantly, Yugi wondered if it felt like this for Joey too whenever Yugi's got his own hands in the teens hair, petting and scritching away. He hopes so. Because this. If anyone was most deserving of a feeling like this it'd without a singular doubt be Joey Wheeler. In all honesty, Yugi wasn't even trying to at least catch every other word the other teen was saying, lost in the feeling of his hands in his hair and against his scalp. Anyone else. Anyone else it'd be degrading (and not in the heart pounding way). But with Joey? God. Somehow he both feels like he's nothing (in a good way, something he had no idea was possible) and someone. And suddenly, there was an arm around his neck as Joey puts him into a--playful--headlock. It snaps Yugi out of. Whatever that had been. His hands fly to grasp at Joey's sleeves as he gleefully shrieks the blondes name. The moment left as soon as it came, the filling the once mostly silent room with loud laughter and banter.