his friend is waiting for him!

I hate it when you’re reading smut and you can’t figure out what position they’re in.

ITS BACK

lord 

Y’ALL NEED JESUS

Please stop reblogging this post

This post made my water break

In honor of my daughter’s first birthday next week, I’m sharing the post that made me laugh so hard that it broke my water.

WHAT

God, I love this accursed website.

Hey internet, the girl that was born from this post is 4 years old today (July 2 2021) also, the gif still makes me laugh. Happy Birthday, Marceline!!

Happy July 2nd, 2024, guess Marceline is 7 now

Happy July 2nd, 2025; she’s 8 now (5am for me)

Happy Birthday to my Marceline, 8 years ago today (July 2, 2025) she came into this world five days before her due date to see wtf was so funny 🤣 this post, like many other things, are on a long list of topics to discuss when she’s older lol

Happy 9th Birthday Little Marceline!!! (July 2 2026)

It’s July 2 2026 internet, help me wish a Happy Birthday to my brilliant and beautiful 9 year old, Marceline! I’ve shown her (most of) the comments and she says “thank u internet 😁😁”

You know, there's this cliché that teenage boys always eat massive amounts, but teenage girls really aren't that different if they're not suppressed by diet culture and body shaming. Like, I was a teenage girl who frankly just stopped bothering to fit into mainstream beauty ideals at some point, and I would regularly make myself just one big massive pot of pasta and devour it completely. This wasn't even stress eating or anything, I just genuinely needed the energy because you know, I was a teenager and my body was developing. I feel like so many teenage girls think they need to eat as little as possible to be petite and pretty, but the truth is that your body is developing just as intensely as teenage boys' bodies. Eat more, please, your body needs it.

I wish to god every single post about womanhood and girlhood and breaking down stereotypes wouldnt be co opted by fucking TIMs like no David it doesnt go double for you, stfu. This is a post about how young girls who are told to starve themselves for patriarchal pedophile beauty standards deserve to eat like their male counterparts do. This has nothing to do with anime pornbrained men in twirly skirts.

i love declining birth rates 🥰 "what a horrible problem! society will collapse!" oopsie it looks like you're gonna have to make having children worth it 😊 teehee you're gonna have to improve society in order to fix this problem, or it will all collapse. oh noooooo. how horrible. :3c

sunset on summerville is crazy bc the red means i love you is SUCH a popular song . do they even know it's a nerd song from the nerd album by a nerd . and the character it's about kills people for fun and also out of love and adoration . Do they even know shes the cutest in the world ? Do they know . Has anyone told them that shes the cutest in the whole wide world

like . it's So popular . most people on the internet have heard it and people have their interpretations . Little do they know ☝️ Himiko Toga

Whatttt is with the tendency of Tumblr users to seek absolution from every single person who offhandedly posts about disagreeing with something they do

I say this not unkindly, but firmly: to function as a member of a social species, you have to get comfortable with the idea that not everyone will like you

one of the many reasons to insist upon chronological timelines is that it's much, much harder to scroll forever if you can catch up with yourself. if you can run out of tumblr because you reach yesterday, that is a good and helpful prompt to do something else.

Which isnt hard to do

unblock me right now i am a sweetheart

unblock me right now i am a sweetheart

Christian babies have so far not found a purpose or use outside of baseball