frail newborn Thing

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@moonnhare
frail newborn Thing

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mpreg
since no one seems to be happy with lgbt, mogai, or any other acronym or umbrella term, i came up with a new one that i think is gonna cover all our bases:
mpreg = marginalized people of romantic, erotic and gender
Yeahh you do
you want to die by his hand so bad it makes you look stupid

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spoilers for I Saw The TV Glow -
I keep seeing interpretations of Owen revisiting The Pink Opaque and finding it cheesy/childish as being a critique of nostalgia / not worshipping media from your youth, and sure whatever, I get the angle - but I don’t read it that way?
It’s “cheesy” because she’s snuffed out the spark. The glow. She grew up to Be A Man. Raise A Family. She severed the psychic connection - and with that repression, she loses the emotional richness she found in the show as a kid, it’s no longer a boundless space of self exploration / expansion because she’s shoved it all back down and buried it deep inside herself. And that’s the tragedy of that scene. Her family is nonexistent, the campfire she sits around is missing Tara, her favorite show is rendered emotionless, like herself… she snuffed out the space to become the Isabel she always was.
It’s that societal pressure to conform, to sand down your edges and be “consumable”to society. To be “content”, in both senses of the word.
“Traditionally in the horror genre, I think that the monster, the dread, the danger, the horror is something external, right? It’s like we’re running from the monster. The monster has been unleashed, and it’s coming for us, and we need to get away,” Schoenbrun said. “Whereas in my films, if there is a horror element to it, it’s very internal and it’s very subliminal, and in ‘World’s Fair,’ it’s this force inside Casey that might not even be real. In ‘I Saw the TV Glow,’ it’s this thing that Owen is hiding from that’s essentially killing him slowly from the inside. And I think this feels like an accurate way to talk about my own experience of dysphoria, which is very ambient and very subliminal until you break and scream at the top of your lungs at a child’s birthday party in an arcade.” Which is exactly what happens in “I Saw the TV Glow,” and it was through making “We’re All Going to the World’s Fair” that Schoenbrun began to understand their own trans identity more clearly. In that sense, the new film is their most autobiographical, as the dread-filled experience of gender dysphoria becomes the movie’s horror aesthetic. “I think that we’re so used to expressions of transness in film that are fully externalized, right? It’s all about the external image. It’s all about looking in a mirror, and the mirror is cracked maybe, and you don’t feel like yourself, and you’ve always just wanted to be a beautiful woman, but you’re in a man’s body. This is just so far from my own pre-transition experience. I avoided mirrors, in fact, because I was hiding from myself, and the way that I hid from myself manifested in all of these unconscious ways and in all of these coping mechanisms that had so much more to do with this subtle, almost tonal sense that something was unreal or wrong or passing me by, this ghostly quality of life,” Schoenbrun said. The filmmaker continued, “So when I am making a movie about that, or in the future when I make a movie about healing from that, it only makes sense for it to be sort of imbued in the language of the film as a whole, tone, rhythm, the way time works in the movies, the aesthetics of liminality and of this sort of fuzziness of whatever it might be, static, analog, low-quality internet video. All of these feel to me like more truthful expressions of that feeling of unreality that we call dysphoria than a more direct and externalized expression of it.”
Jane Schoenbrun on How the Dread and Deterioration of ‘Twin Peaks: The Return’ Influenced ‘I Saw the TV Glow’
come home, the kettle’s whistling
The fucking parachute. And the inflatable planetarium. Fake, ephemeral “rooms” made of plastic and air. Fake spaces that will inevitably fall into each themselves and on top of their inhabitants. Fake spaces kept stable by the pumping of air. Fake spaces with colors and stars and the strange feeling of being enclosed.
And they’re inside a high school gym class. Good god.

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sometimes it feels more real than real life.
i got out of the theater 5 hours ago and i'm still sitting here thinking about i saw the tv glow like the entire concept of a horror movie that's not truly a horror movie until the very last scene. the concept of a horror movie where the horror is not a literal monster or a monster as metaphor for the self the horror is literally just the self and the damage done to oneself when you refuse a fundamental part of your identity. and how part of the horror isn't just the damage done to yourself but also to the people who can relate to you and who love and want to help you. but also that little glimmer of hope in "there is still time" because even just looking into the heart of yourself in the mirror is a step forward, even if you take two steps back immediately after. like the horror in hope and the hope in horror and how the whole reason horror is even a thing is because of the existence of hope (and its failure) god this movie is SO good i need to watch it again immediately.
Fuck.
I SAW THE TV GLOW (2024) DIR. JANE SCHOENBRUN
can't stop thinking about this movie tbh..

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a moment of clarity. of life clawed free from the grave inside you. and then apologizing for it. apologizing for it. apologizing for it.
2nd watch, a few new details:
On the first watch, I was like "of course Owen couldn't go with Maddy the first time, her mom had cancer :(". But this time I caught that Maddy went missing "a few weeks" after Owen's mom died. Owen had nothing left to stay for. Maddy probably waited around for those extra weeks, just in case Owen had a change of heart. And yet,
The first time we see the dress flashback, it's through what seems like a relatively objective perspective. The second time we see it (as they walk to the grave), the memory has taken on the vhs-fuzz and aspect ratio of the pink opaque tapes. The real becomes unreal, an impossible fantasy, "kid stuff"
Happened to see a captioned screening this time, and the Tara from the streaming version is described as "Fake Tara."
The tv guide page Owen finds by the electrical field is for "season 6, episode 1: Escape from the Midnight Realm"
Mr. Melancholy and Maddy's ex friend who accused them of dykery ("like a secret agent sent to ruin my life") were the same actor
All the school hallway motivational posters are thematically relevant, but this time I caught the "the only easy day is yesterday" and "courage: without it, no other virtues matter" ones
You can see the emotional shifts between Owen and Narrator Owen in real time (ie, Owen looking distraught as the firefighters surround Maddy's tv, then dropping the expression and looking coolly into the camera as she starts to narrate again)
There's an interesting recurring thing where audio from the near "future" plays over footage from the "past." ie, we hear Maddy's planetarium monologue, while we watch Owen still walking to the school to meet them. Something about time not working right, something about Owen playing back memories that already happened, something about inevitability and walking down a path with a fixed ending
Void High School, or VHS