Dont Ask Me About The Cars Universe

Whats up tunblr basically i just wrote this book with tons of dope fan fiction trope buzz woeds and gay characters fucking & sucking each other the entire book U will like it automaticaly i think since it has those blaze ths shit imediately🔥🔥🔥

the menstrual cup and menstrual scepter

Even in left wing circles it’s literally like pulling teeth trying to get people to take misogyny seriously as a real problem that is killing women and ruining their lives everywhere all the time and not like a haha silly 1950s problem we just make jokes about now

nobody coughs up blood dramatically into their handkerchiefs anymore

in all fairness, toddlers are funny as fuck. babies will cry because they are experiencing at least ten different senses for the first time all at once and it’s a bit overwhelming for them. fair enough. toddlers will make the most wretched sound you’ve ever heard because you wouldn’t let them run out into a car park and die

Honestly I think a lot of fantasy authors could take a lesson from sci-fi and just, have their fantasy worlds explicitly *not* show The Entire World as it exists in-universe. If that makes sense. Like in space exploration stuff it's common to namedrop a bunch of shit we're not unpacking right now to signal the expansiveness of the universe without having to do extensive worldbuilding for like 100s of cultures you're only gonna see once. It's honestly weird that high fantasy rarely ever does this! This is the easiest ticket out of (gestures broadly) the whole "one (1) country for Africa and Asia each" thing. Maybe it's not relevant to the plot maybe your map is only covering a specific corner of the world where the story is happening. It can still exist in the background. You can just do that

explained to an 8 year old that once a fruit is ripe you only have so much time until it rots so you have to eat it soon and she said so i'll never be able to keep it perfect like this forever? no and there are about a million pieces of art for you unrelatedly

Yes, your dentist can absolutely tell if you masturbated at home before your appointment. And in fact, a shower and change of clothes does little to hide this. The best step forward is to apologize to your dentist for masturbating.

- mockup of results from my new search engine called "Google OCD"

Having seen some births now i can say that dog birth is amazing cos they just slip n slide out one after the other like a little conveyor belt. And theyre so little and unformed. And then UNGULATE BIRTHS ... are amazing for the opposite reason which is that 10mins after being born they are filing their taxes. Unless they are goats, in which case they are committing tax fraud instead

Goats are what is called a precocial species, which means that shortly after birth they are able to do many thimgs on their own, such as standing, walking, eating, and embezzlement

I mean, in some very interesting Technically Correct ways, they didn't actually die? Now, they're very much no longer alive. But the forces involved are such that they didn't get any of the usual cellular processes of death, they simply went from biology to physics in less time than it takes a signal to travel down your optic nerve.

if you go from biology to physics without dying first you don’t go to heaven the uber driver went over this already

For this game of dodgeball, I will be specifically targeting the gayest and most autistic among you to eliminate. 

Okay so normal rules then