Minikin

Can’t risk it

The duck of creativity. I waited so long for it.

if i was a pirate captain i would get a movie projector and play a movie on the big sails every friday night for my boys to kick back and enjoy some time off unless we were under attack

Pirates legit did the 16-17th century equivalent of this. When things were slow, they would put on plays, act out dramas of stories they knew, or freestyle. The most preferred model of original productions was courtroom drama: “trying” each other for piracy. The “accused” would list off their many, dramatically and humorously embellished crimes, and be equally dramatically sentenced. Sometimes there was a daring escape, sometimes just a really maudlin death scene, but a good time was had by all.

As we all suspected, pirates are theater nerds.

Half of being a pirate was theater. Blackbeard supposedly lit smokey things on fire in his beard so his head would look demonic and people would freak out and give him their stuff

I rose, I sung along, and I sung loud

Just one of these checks could change my life ,

I think we can all use this energy

So this gave me chronic whiplash, enjoy.

where’s that video of the naked crackhead literally running the speed of a moving car and I use the term literally literally he was deadass keeping up with the car

Hi! Humans don’t have an eye shine, so that’s not a person!

Reblog this within 10 seconds and unexpected extra money will cum to you this week

The money will do what now

I don’t care how the money gets here tbh

i.e. why when you or someone else gets stabbed or impaled, you should leave the object in the wound until medical help arrives.

Name a conspiracy theory superior in raw power to “there are no actual forests on Earth"

imma need some context on that cause WHAT?

“forests” = minuscule form of what trees on Earth can be, basically saplings “mesas” = not landforms, but petrified ancient tree trunks IIRC the theory goes that all forests on Earth were destroyed ages ago and it takes them ridiculous times to regrow, with those giant mammoth redwood trees just being the oldest ones that have grown the most

Who/what cut down the trees to make them mesas, for what purpose, and with what tools?

I’ve actually looked a little deeper into this, and the short answer is that humans cut them down with future tech. This theory is a sub-theory of flat earth, as it makes use of a lot of the same basic assumptions about the world, most importantly that our entire worldview is a construct created by the elite that controls our world from the shadows. By keeping knowledge from us, they can treat us like sheep without expecting resistance. Part of this theory is that we had advanced machines and supercomputers way back, even in the ancient times, and that all history older than about 100 years is a lie crafted by this elite in the wake of a nuclear war in the 1800s.

What would we use all that wood for, and where did it go?

Rock is wood. Or rather, wood becomes rock as it grows and the trees reach massive heights. They essentially mined the trees for useful minerals and metals, and for the construction of whatever secret structres they use to control us.

Steal dnd settings from conspiracy theorists every day bc this shit is too good

My wife is a physical therapist.  She started tearing up when I showed this to her.

I love seeing ableist norms broken.

Just a quick wave to RemapNI who adapt devices for people with disabilities

When you die, you appear in a cinema with a number of other people who look like you. You find out that they are your previous reincarnations, and soon you all begin watching your next life on the big screen.

too much

My previous incarnations throwing popcorn at the screen and booing: this bitch is fucking stupid!!!