NotLily¿

Everything was fine, I made myself a cappuccino for breakfast, then I was sad because I wasn't going to be able to go out with my boyfriend because he was busy, suneore is busy, we haven't gone out together for a long time and whenever he tells me that we won't be able to go out it leaves me super sad and a little angry.

But taking that out everything is being perfect, my mother went to the shopping center with my stepfather and they brought me a red hair dye and an Alpino chocolate bar. The chocolate bar is DELICIOUS. Just today I dyed my hair and it was beautiful, but I think my eyebrow area was a little irritated because I also dyed my eyebrows, although the color is not very noticeable.

And the best part? I'M GOING TO EAT PIZZA, I'm happy.

(I've been a little missing around here too😬)

Several things happened, I had a boring party at high school, right now I'm upset about some things that have been happening in my relationship 😬😭, I've been feeling a little excluded by my friends and things like that, I'm having a bad time. Do we chalk it up to my undiagnosed depression? (not yet diagnosed, wait until I go to a psychologist, AHAHAHAHAH).

But anyway, I've been helping my mother more at home and I'm trying to make sure that nothing affects me, I want to grow as a person and the truth is that I've realized that I've been very good to people, when they don't give me the same as I give, they're selfish and so on, So I decided that this is not going to continue to affect me and I am not going to be so good anymore, obviously maintaining respect.

IN JULY I START THE GYM, that's the coolest thing in the world, on Thursday I might go to a party with my family and on Saturday I'm going to do her nails #lifeisgood

Anyway, I don't know what else to say, I love you guys💞

If you see, I'm happy today😋

I went out with my friends and my bf, it was really cool, I'm so happy, we joke and laugh, it was so cool, now I'm eating and is sooo sooo delicioso HAAHAHA

Sorry to put everything here, is like my personal diary, It's all the things I think, all the things I don't know how to tell to other people, and the things I wanna say but I just can't, and I really feel like I don't have a person to talk to.

So... this is my scape to say Whatever I want, without being judged, or something like that.

I got piss for some things with a girl in my school and then I got a bad moment. Thanks to the gods tomorrow I'm not going to school, I don't really want to go to my debate class, I don't feel confortable anymore. Like, last time I was excluded, I'm having a thing with some friends, I don't really enat to see people, interact with them or play attention to class, my bf talk and laugh with a girl that is my ex best friend, I DON'T EVEN KNOW SINCE WHEN THEY KNOW EACH OTHER.

and the cherry of the cake is that my mum got some problem in the gallbladder and that's why tomorrow I'm going to miss school 😃🔫

Im so Happy beacuse I have a New concealer and blush, is two in one. And I have a New cup for my coffee, now I can bring coffee to school.

A while before the doorbell rang, I went to get my things and went to the bathroom. I texted my boyfriend (who is in the debate with me) and said, "I'm in the bathroom, I'm coming." So far so good, the bell rings to enter classes, I wash my hands, leave the bathroom and go up to the first floor, when I enter the room, most of my friends and my boyfriend were there, sitting with more people (who are my acquaintances but not close to the point of being friends) all together in a row at the back, side by side. Obviously I wanted to sit with them, but in the place where I went to sit, a friend was already sitting, so I left there and sat alone at a table.

I felt super excluded alone at that table, I felt like crying just because of that, and because I knew that if any of them were late, I would have saved a place for them as I thought they were going to do with me, when I entered the room I thought that my friends and my boyfriend were going to be sitting together as always waiting for me, It's what I would have done, but I always think more about others.

When I sat down, I heard a friend complain that I was alone, she spoke as if with pity, I didn't want to feel sorry for me, I didn't want to feel sorry for me. They tried to get me to sit with them and I refused because there was literally no room for me to sit with them. It was then that I heard that friend send my boyfriend to sit with me, at that point I didn't want that, I didn't want my boyfriend to leave his friends to sit with me and I didn't want him to be there either because it wasn't his initiative to do so, if he was the excluded one, I would have sat with him without thinking about it, But I didn't run him off just so I wouldn't be rude or look like I was playing the victim. I also thought, why do they send my boyfriend? Why doesn't one of my friends come and sit with me? Why didn't they save me a place?...

Maybe I'm exaggerating but I felt really bad, I hate being so sensitive 😭

That's when I realized that maybe they didn't care about me as much as I thought.