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We post about plurality, politics, literature, stupid text posts, creature related things, queerness, etc. Some of our posts are vaguely NSFW, but we don't get graphic with sex/gore or anything.
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We don't have a strict DNI.
If we do not agree with you, we will block you. If we do not want to see your content, we will block you. It is not personal.
No active side blogs at this moment.
Asks are open.
Discord is oimmortalone, please ask before messaging.
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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
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If you experience any changes in body control (switching, possession, etc.), then establish some form of consistent, asynchronous external communication with your system. External communication has a major benefit: you can still talk to each other across switches (asynchronously) even if the inside of your mind is a mess.
You might set up a journal, whiteboard, calendar, a "single user, multi-account" app like Mytter or Antar, sticky notes, etc. Anything goes as long as your system knows to check it occasionally (or at the least, in an emergency).
We recommend choosing an analog method for your fallback communication method if possible, as a power outage could take out a lot of digital methods. A spur-of-the-moment piece of paper left on a table is better than nothing, but it's less likely to work than a pocket notebook or bulletin board that every system member knows to use for communication if needed. You can always add an app or program once everyone knows where to go for your analog fallback.
Discuss how you want to treat each other. Keep it loose and informal for now- don't make any absolute Laws just yet. Think of it more like the quick agreements that roommates make with each other for practical reasons: "I'll do the dishes if you do the laundry".
A few classics: "try not to die, don't kill anyone else, don't get any tattoos as an impulse decision, and don't throw out things that don't belong to you."
Don't force agreements on anyone. If someone disagrees, then stop and discuss their concerns to find a better agreement. See: Consensus Decision Making.
Map your system, if it feels right. This can help you learn about each other, but it can also be soothing to feel like you have some understanding of who's in your head when you're being flooded with new system members.
Again, keep it simple. What do you actually need to know? What would help you in a practical sense? Start there, then branch out if you'd like to get to know each other better.
Consider making a simple guide to your life. If someone had to handle a day in your life with little to no prior knowledge of it, then what would they need to know?
Where should they check to see if you have any appointments? Are they responsible for feeding any pets? Where can they find money if they need it, and how do they know how much to spend? Do you have a job, and do they need to work it? Etc.
Hopefully you never need this guide, but it's a lifesaver for any unexpectedly amnesiac system members.
Focus on building bridges and trust. Get to know the folks in your head. Find ways to talk and just get to know them. Listen as much as you talk, if not more.
Learn to lean on each other for support, if you can. Trust is one of the most valuable things that you can have in a system. Trust gets you through a lot of tough situations. Give your system members every reason to trust you, and try to learn to trust them in turn.
If someone is hostile, then ask what's driving the hostility. Do they feel under-represented in your life? Does peace make them feel unsafe because they don't know where the threats are? Are they bored, scared, frustrated, or routinely unhappy?
What can you do to support them? What do they need to feel comfortable?
Don't worry about knowing everything. You're just figuring this out- give yourselves some grace for not knowing as much as everyone else seems to. (Besides, they know less than you think. I've yet to meet a system without a single mystery left in it, including folks who've known for decades, and many systems are forever figuring things out in one way or another.)
Ask for information when you need it and let your system explain itself over time; let your system set the pace. You'll get better information that way, and your system will learn that they can trust you to respect them when they say "no, don't touch that yet."
Screw plural community labels for now. Seriously. Screw figuring out origins or consciousness or whatever the linguistic dividing line of the month is. Don't worry about it. These words come and go. Get to know yourselves first.
Why am I suggesting this? Community labels will still be there when you've figured out how to work with each other in a practical sense, and your stronger understanding of each other will make it much easier to find whatever words you wind up needing. Hunting for words now is likely to get you stuck trying to cram a bunch of shifting unknowns into someone else's categorization system, and it might cloud your situation more than it clears it.
Given that you're still settling into the idea of sharing a head at all, getting into the nitty-gritty of labels is probably going to be less helpful than figuring out how to handle doubt and denial issues (or getting communication going, or learning to manage switching, or...), hence the recommendation not to worry about it.
That said: do use labels if you need them. Just remember that labels are tools. Don't let the tools use you.
Also, screw the discourse. If you listen to any one item on this list, make it this one.
Plural community discourse tends to be a little bit rancid in the "debating whether your experiences exist meaningfully in our spaces" way, and it will fuck you up as a new system. Get past the worst of your denial or doubt issues first to avoid worsening the "oh my god, am I faking without knowing it" hell brainworms. Please. I am actually begging you. Avoid the discourse until you've dealt with your own existential doubts.
None of these things are obligations, nor is there any rush to do them. It's just a cluster of things that I tend to suggest to newly discovered systems, and I realized that I don't think we've actually rattled these off on this blog yet.
we have to start running a massive PSA campaign to young gay people so everyone understands there is a difference between being a dom and being a top and between being a sub and being a bottom. and also that sometimes you are neither a sub nor a bottom and you're just like shy. we need to be handing out flyers we need ads at every train station spreading the word
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makes me so sad when my friends refuse to pirate things and insist on paying for a streaming service EVEN when i offer to do it for them or teach them. like pleaseeee i have a vpn i have a plex server i can get you whatever you want. don't buy disney+ i can be your little poob i have it for you.
how do you know if you have severe enough trauma to be a system? this isnât me claiming you arenât one at all I just doubt myself quite a bit.
OOUHH. BEEN THERE.
I cared about that So Hard for So Long because I kept seeing people say that if your trauma isn't "severe enough" then none of your other experiences matter regardless of how obvious everything else is. I cared SO HARD that at age 14 I tried my very best to remember ALL MY TRAUMA in order to "prove" that I was really a system. very very bad idea. spent years doubly traumatised because I was NOT SUPPOSED TO REMEMBER ALL THAT.
all that to say. sometimes "knowing for sure" isn't the most important thing. sometimes seeking it out actually makes you feel worse.
human brains are also CRAZY THINGS. who knows what each person's individual threshold for becoming a system is?? there are current theories regarding trauma, absolutely, but there are also so many variations in brains that it can be impossible to account for every individual experience. for me, my trauma was ABSOLUTELY enough to account for this. but to others, it might not be.
if I were you, I would do my best to focus on the experiences that help you understand your situation better, rather than the experiences other people say should define your life.
to deny all your other experiences because you feel like you didn't "go through enough" is something I wouldn't wish on anyone. if you're here now, experiencing these things, you most likely went through MORE than enough.
and if you feel like there's more you can't remember, it's probably not a good idea to go looking. often, you can't easily re-bury what you uncover, and your brain has blocked it out for a reason. at the very least, explore that alongside a professional.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
how do you know if you have severe enough trauma to be a system? this isnât me claiming you arenât one at all I just doubt myself quite a bit.
OOUHH. BEEN THERE.
I cared about that So Hard for So Long because I kept seeing people say that if your trauma isn't "severe enough" then none of your other experiences matter regardless of how obvious everything else is. I cared SO HARD that at age 14 I tried my very best to remember ALL MY TRAUMA in order to "prove" that I was really a system. very very bad idea. spent years doubly traumatised because I was NOT SUPPOSED TO REMEMBER ALL THAT.
all that to say. sometimes "knowing for sure" isn't the most important thing. sometimes seeking it out actually makes you feel worse.
human brains are also CRAZY THINGS. who knows what each person's individual threshold for becoming a system is?? there are current theories regarding trauma, absolutely, but there are also so many variations in brains that it can be impossible to account for every individual experience. for me, my trauma was ABSOLUTELY enough to account for this. but to others, it might not be.
if I were you, I would do my best to focus on the experiences that help you understand your situation better, rather than the experiences other people say should define your life.
to deny all your other experiences because you feel like you didn't "go through enough" is something I wouldn't wish on anyone. if you're here now, experiencing these things, you most likely went through MORE than enough.
and if you feel like there's more you can't remember, it's probably not a good idea to go looking. often, you can't easily re-bury what you uncover, and your brain has blocked it out for a reason. at the very least, explore that alongside a professional.
I want to learn more exclamations that arenât strictly just religious stuff. âJesus Christâ this, âoh my godâ that, nah I want something fresh.
What are some of yâallâs favorite exclamations that arenât about god?
had a friend who used to make new ones up on the spot. The only one that stuck with me was 'good golly jelly beans'. If something catastrophic happens I go for 'that's not ideal.'
