ISSUE 1025: hairpin associate

Unfortunately, many systems form as a result of childhood sexual trauma or abuse. And an uncomfortable, not oft spoken about issue that sometimes accompanies that is the development of unhealthy paraphilias. Here’s to systems (traumatized or not) who have paraphilias of any kind!

Shoutout to systems who are receiving treatment or support for their paraphilias! We are so proud of you for taking steps to take care of yourself and your system!

Shoutout to systems who feel guilty, dirty, or ashamed because of their paraphilias! You can’t help the mental illnesses you formed, and just because you have unwanted thoughts or tendencies does not make you a bad person!

Shoutout to systems who struggle every day not to act on their paraphilias! We see you and admire your efforts. Please don’t give up the fight, even when it gets hard!

Shoutout to systems who have reached out to a loved one or mental health specialist in order to get help for their paraphilias. Asking for help is not always easy, especially when it involves something that makes others feel uncomfortable or icky.

As a fellow system with headmates who struggle with paraphilias, we know personally how disturbing, frustrating, embarrassing, and scary it can be! But please remember that your paraphilia is a part of your mental illness. You should not hate yourself because of your paraphilia - instead you may choose to view it as a symptom that requires care and effort to treat.

We care about y’all and love y’all just the way you are - no matter how many paraphilias you have or how well you manage them! We we wish y’all hope, recovery, and a future full of kindness and self-acceptance! :)