BTW the mycelium has already overtaken me and it's delightful

The Baudelaires: That's count Olaf! Every adult in a five mile radius: Don't be ridiculous.

If the p*rn bots keep liking my asoue posts, I’m gonna start asking them what they think is in the sugar bowl

I need to hear your opinion, sexyjames129754

Georgina’s phone number

Thank you, sexyjames129754

The bots are liking this one now

Thinking about Dr. Montgomery Montgomery who was so pissed at his coworkers he found a nice snake and decided to call it the incredibly deadly viper just to fuck with everyone

There are a lot of words I already knew when I first read A Series of Unfortunate Events, but I never forget specifically which ones I did learn from it

Bitches be like “this is my comfort series” and it’s a series about three orphan children being terrorized by a count who wants their fortune and keeps murdering everyone they love

Happy pride month to mysterious apprentices, determined chemists, journalists in towns without newspapers, girls with question mark eyebrows and smiles that could mean anything, girls that perform a two-person caper on their own, Jacques Snicket, chefs that love their gfs, typists with strict mothers, recently kidnapped actresses, and firefighting sculptors <33

i genuinely stan esme squalour’s fashion choices. have the guts to dress up as the horny salad or rubber octopus you want to see in the world