better things are coming

When my parrot wants pets off someone he’ll go up to them, say hello, and lower his head to expose his neck. Recently, however, he’s been doing this to a pitch black crevice behind the couch, even trying to cajole the darkness with kissy noises and getting sad when the void won’t pet him. How do I explain that dark chasms are not friends?

There’s a ghost in there

a damn rude one, too. PET THE BIRD.

*friend showing me a picture of their boyfriend* well. well. that is a human man!

When my parrot wants pets off someone he’ll go up to them, say hello, and lower his head to expose his neck. Recently, however, he’s been doing this to a pitch black crevice behind the couch, even trying to cajole the darkness with kissy noises and getting sad when the void won’t pet him. How do I explain that dark chasms are not friends?

There’s a ghost in there

a damn rude one, too. PET THE BIRD.

please for the love of god turn ur sound on

i hate how reward systems never work for me like i can’t just say “if i finish this assignment i can have a cookie” bc my brain is like “…..or u could just have one right now” and i can’t argue with that logic

Self-imposed deadlines don’t work either because I know the guy who set them and he’s full of shit

me as your neighbor: *in my garden at 10 pm using a flashlight to pick basil*