ur local dumpster baby

Jeff Goldblum is like if your uncle were a manic Pixie dream girl

yall done being straight yet?

Mood

BIG Mood

the biggest of all moods

Are you ever just… really disappointed to learn someone is straight

I guess the majority of the population disappoints you then.

correct

asked a customer if he had a MyPanera card and he told me a “disreputable friend” of his stole all his rewards cards while he was in a year-long coma

lettuce is just the bones of vegebles

my little brother told me this

aw how old is he

he’s 20

We’re all just ex-emo kids tryin to make it in this post-emo world

why u lookin up almond joys in the background

I had beef wit somone

Is it ok if i swear?

yes fish, i will allow you to swear

f

yes go on

im nervous

fu…

fuc

fuck.

fuck

fuck!

I’m so proud.

YES!!!!!! I LIKED MY OWN VIDEO!!!!! ARE YOU GUYS HAPPY NOW???? I LIKED MY OWN GOD DAMN VIDEO!!!!!!!! I CAN UNLIKE IT IF YOU WANT

All these lesbian ships…one by one sinking to the bottom of Hollywood business…meanwhile Canada gives us Orphan Black and Carmilla.