gigi | perpetually yearning for something more
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@mazhai
gigi | perpetually yearning for something more
substack

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As a Greek, in response to the current controversy about Matt Damon being cast as Odysseus, I'd just like to share that one of the moments that changed my brain chemistry as a kid was reading a novelized version of the Odyssey and coming across the following description of Odysseus when Circe sees him for the first time and thinks he's hot: "his hair curled like a clematis and his eyes were very brown".
So may I present my own casting choice for Odysseus:
Excuse me???
you are right and you should say it.
Is this the face of a man who would put his own infant in front of a plow to avoid going to war?
Absolutely not
You know who would try that shit?
Is this the face of a man who would defy the very gods to get home to his wife?
You know who would defy the gods just to show he could get away with it?
The last thing Penelope's suitors ever see:
L’étreinte de Briony Marshall
crazy how i find myself thinking i've got a handle on it all finally and then i see the ways that other people tangle their lives together so easily and live so easily together with their friends and i feel like that girl at the top of the stairs painting by norman rockwell
i'll always be here
they’re foreclosing on my mind palace

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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im not above eating some low hanging fruit like if theres low hanging fruit i might eat some
some of the music i listen to is straight up bad
I love making people feel human and accepted. I’m not flirting with you.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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“I realized that even if no one ever found me, and even if I lived out the rest of my life here, always missing, forever a missing person to other people, I could never be missing to myself, I could never delete my own history, and I would always know exactly where I was and where I had been and I would never wake up not being whom I was and it didn’t matter how much or how little I thought I understood the mess of myself, because I would never, no matter what I did, be missing to myself and that was what I had wanted all this time, to go fully missing, but I would never be able to go fully missing — nobody is missing like that, no one has ever had that luxury and no one ever will.”
— Catherine Lacey, Nobody Is Ever Missing (via fragmentarie)
Words by Andrea Gibson
Solitude
Great Plains, Nebraska
photo Andrew Moore
and the grocery store is never just the grocery store. i'm staring at cereal boxes trying to find one that'll stain my heart honey-sweet again. i'm pacing the snack aisle looking for an epiphany or addiction. i'm circling the croissants like they'll make my life beautiful. i'm looking at birthday cards wondering who i have left to congratulate. i'm clutching my sleeves in the produce section. as if this particular lettuce will cleanse away years of inner turmoil. i'm cradling wilted bouquets like precious cargo--have i ever been held this tender, this secure? i'm hovering before the self-checkout and cashier line, wondering if it'd be nice to go through something with someone else for once.
*
barthes

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encountering casual misogyny and spiraling ahhh ok this is normallll ahhahahaha okayyyyy got it its casual its so embedded in us lets hate women with mama ok ahah. give me a gun