A Blank Canvas

Full Name: Maureen Dame Nickname(s): M, Dot, Firefly, ‘Reena Age: Twenty Date of Birth: February 6th  Astrological Sign: Aquarius Birthplace: New Hope, The New Eastern Front Fatal Flaw: She could either be very blunt because she has a hard time reading a room (which results to someone’s feelings possibly getting hurt) or too composed. A lot of things go over her head so when dealing with Maureen you may have to be specific.   Family Members: None Relationship Status: Single Sexuality: Heterosexual

Physical

Hair Color: Dirty blonde/brown Eye Color: Brown with gold flecks Height: 5'8" Weight: 125lbs Build: Although she may look petite she is strong pertaining to how her genes were set up by the government.  Voice: Maureen speaks without many contractions or simplified words. She has an extensive and eloquent vocabulary and doesn't use slang even for the other groups of people around the city of New Hope (ie Outlander terms for Carnies, Government, etc)  Dominant Hand: Ambidextrous  Scar(s): Upper-right shoulder where she had a tracker taken out of her after she had left the orphanage, back of her left leg which looks like a faded dog bite Distinguishing marks: A birth mark on her collar bone which she has been told it's shaped like a lopsided figure eight.  Allergies: None Alcohol tolerance: Unable to get intoxicated Drunken behavior: See above

Psychological

Dreams/Goals: Overall she wants to settle down, and maybe find somewhere reliable and safe for her and the rest of her crew. She’d rather spend the rest of her days with her chosen family than on her own. Skills: She’s a doer, a planner which establishes that she’s very good at tracking, and has the ability to get people out of situations with her skills. Fairly decent with technology, sharp shooter with a weapon, and overall does a good job with obtaining information.   Good Habits: Attentive, Continuously learning  Bad Habits: Insensitive and blunt at times Hobbies: Tinkering, People watching, Reading, Enjoys the company of her crew  Likes: Motorcycles, Snacking, Hiking, Hanging out with her crew Turn Ons: Someone who understands that she takes a little bit to process certain things outside her “programming”, someone who makes her laugh and treats her like a regular girl   Turn Offs: Making fun of the way she talks, playing on her fears that she’s a failure, someone going out of their way to make her feel inadequate by playing mind games/ or not being specific about certain things  Fears: Her greatest fear is failing the Outlanders aside from that she wouldn't know what to do if she lost them on top of that. Comforts: Having the entire team in one place, down time  Positives: Reliable, Intelligent, Confident Negatives: Stubborn, Secretive, Tense

Favorites

Matt’s hand tightened gently through and around Maureen’s, his eyes darting from Maureen’s chin and forehead so as not to look like he had been staring. “Sorry–I–just like looking…at you. Looking at you.” Matt’s face flushed red as the wine took over a little. Matt frantically tried pulling himself together in his own head. The combination of the wine, and Maureen, was throwing him off balance. He actually liked it, a lot. He took a cube of cheese and chewed it down, then reached for the wine but instead held Maureen’s wrist and looked down.

Matt’s head was trying to pull him back, away from the elevator and this feeling of–safety. He was used to watching his back, or having a gun on himself at all times. Perhaps an elevator wasn’t safe either just dangling there. But it had been too long that he’d gone with bottling everything up. Maybe he still could in his own way. But it felt different now. Matt smiled again, and felt himself blushing when his eyes met Maureen’s while she had looked up. His whole face started heating up, and his throat almost choking in on itself. “Yeah…our own little picnic. Wine and… All that.” Matt took another pull from the wine, coughing a little. He held it back out to her, “It’d be a shame to let it go to waste.”

Her smile brightened a little more seeing his, a rarity in its true form and she wasn’t going to waste it by looking at him with the normal face that she held with most conversations. Sure, a good majority of Matt and Maureen’s prior conversations spoke of concerns of where the other was or what they had to do to get by but now, now he was smiling at her in the most genuine way with a smidgen of pink on his cheeks as well as his ears. In truth, she wanted to know what he was thinking and why the color had sudden approached his cheeks in such a fashion as well as why he was almost stammering when he spoke. It was unlike him to not have fluidity in his words. Maureen had always admired him for his public speaking abilities but now they seemed disjointed. 

Matt chuckled and used his free hand to slide his fingers between, and under Maureen’s to take the wine from her and take a long pull from the bottle with the neck clasped in his hand. “Mm–wow yeah, Elevator Wine.” He passed the bottle back to Maureen, his other hand gently holding hers. “Some elevator music, maybe a dwindling light bulb. Could definitely pass off as fancy.”

He looked up at the shaft and heard Carlos swearing and the clanging of metal. Maybe it’d be okay if Carlos didn’t fix the elevator soon, Matt thought to himself, smiling inside.

Matt found himself clenching his hand between Maureen’s. He had pushed so many people away, or kept them far. It made losing them a little easier on himself. But he felt himself needing something, or someone, just for a minute to confide it. To physically be aware of. He had never talked about what happened at the camp. Like everyone knew he would, he had buried it all down and kept them all moving. Really, he was lying to himself and them, all over he was a mess, barely keeping himself together. Moving to whatever place offered shelter or food, then look for another one the next day. It was nothing more than things to barely keep them alive and moving. For now, Matt didn’t want to pretend to be strong or know what he was doing. He felt like he didn’t have to be, not now anyway. Maybe not vulnerable, not yet or ever.

With his other hand, Matt reached into his backpack and slid out a sleek bottle of half-finished wine. “Found it on our pass through that factory. Was saving it for… whenever.” He offered the bottle to her. “Drink?”

The physical closeness didn’t affect Maureen as much as the emotional aspect of it. Her fingers, long and slender fit into Matt’s in a profound way. She wasn’t sure why but the tightening of his grip on hers made something inside of her feel somewhat better. Maybe not all the way better but it did give some relief and allowed her to breathe softly when it seemed as if she had been holding her breath. Still she wasn’t used to this, considering she wasn’t the type to be able to form these types of relationships with people. Sure she could give some insight of her true feelings and different aspects of her life or her personality but she couldn’t begin to give it all. And maybe she wasn’t good with connecting in the past but it didn’t seem so difficult now-- being this physically close to her friend, jacket against jacket, skin on skin (in the most innocent way possible). 

“It’s hard. Making choices that’ll cost either ten or twenty lives, just to keep us going for a couple more days. After so many times it just messes with your head.” Matt’s shoulders loosened and he felt himself melt into his jacket. “The camp.” He looked at her, eyes watering but trying to hold his voice together. “I keep seeing it all in my head. They just… came in and started shooting. Didn’t even care, those monsters just…” Matt rubbed his eyes as clear as he could. Elias was the one that told him it was different taking a life, and seeing one being taken. Matt didn’t understand it until now. For all Matt knew, Elias was dead too.

“We’ll get them for this. One way or another, yeah?” The corner of Matt’s mouth rose into a pity smile, but a smile none the less.

“It seems like all we ever hit is speed bumps, ‘Reena.” Matt opened the bottle and juggled the cap in one hand. “It feels like chipping away at concrete with a fork. There’s just no progress. I don’t…” He took a sip of water and capped the bottle, and pulled himself back before continuing any further. Matt avoided looking at Maureen for a while and looked at the opposite corner instead.

“I’m not a great leader. I’ve just gambled with whatever choices I had and hoped it worked.” He cleared his throat “Thank you though.”

Matt grabbed the bars on the door and shook them, sighing through his nose. He caught the water bottle and leaned against the opposite side of the elevator, eventually sliding into a defeated sitting position. He hated being trapped like this, with no control over the situation. They’d both have to just sit there. Matt passed the water bottle between his hands for a while, eventually taking a sip.

He nodded, “Can always count on you to think of things.” Matt leaned and threw his backpack into the middle of the elevator. “Me. I’m getting us stuck in elevators. Some leader, huh?”

The rhythm of the water bottle soothed her although it was a mindless tick to pass the time or to halt the agitation that he felt on the inside. Like Maureen, Matt couldn’t be trapped like this with no way out or no knowledge of what was going to happen next. They were doers, the planners, the ones who get people out of situations rather than get stuck when they were in one. But when outside forces didn’t come in their favor they didn’t crack under pressure, no, they figured it out. But this wasn’t an agent cornering them or a rouge gang coming after them this was a power outage, a stuck elevator-- a force that they weren’t able to break through.