Mare Stillwell

in the beginning of the season, all he wanted was to sit quietly in the background, exist in peace, and yearn for suho without the world clawing at him. but he’s a gravitational force. he doesn’t seek the world, the world seeks him. the good, the bad, all of it. and even though he never seeks human connection, insists that he doesn’t need friends, he loves having them. he loves loving them.

he’s not loud about it, he doesn’t know how to be, but his loyalty is violent, bone-deep, unwavering. he’ll fight for his friends, kill for them, stand up to their dads without blinking. he’ll set himself on fire to keep them warm.

and the most tragic part? he could’ve stayed invisible. he could've stayed out of it all. the bad guys didn’t even want him, they wanted baku. but sieun’s heart won't let him walk away. his instinct to protect always wins. always. something he learnt from suho.

he shows up (all four feet of him); no real fighting skills, no actual strength, just this terrifying cocktail of rage, stubbornness, desperation, and whatever object he can get his hands on to stab someone with.

but beneath all of that, he’s just a kid. a scared, tired, broken kid. he flinched when seongje first cornered him in the bathroom. he cried when his friends told him it wasn’t his fault. he carries the kind of guilt that rots you from the inside out, and he’s still trying to make sense of it. still trying to believe he deserves good things.

...........oh my god...........oh my GOD...........

Because Hae in is a typical chaebol. The only difference is she's a woman now. And you expect her to be more nurturing, more caring, more communicative than the man. And that's why you hate her. Big deal people. She's human. She has her flaws. We're seeing her character grow.

*spoilers below if you haven't watched up to ep. 8 of queen of tears*

*you have been warned*

crying for the fifth time this week watching this series.

I am so wrecked. Like I get both sides and how they've hurt each other, this drama has done the unexpected and I LOVE THAT.

To me, I understand hyun-woo's reasons at first, but I feel like hae-in's suffering was heavier.

Hae-In was abused by her family too, probably worse. So much to the point that she didn't feel like she deserved to live after her older brother died and even more so with her own BIOLOGICAL mother basically blamed her for her brother's death, not letting her to learn how to grieve properly. That even her own unborn child's death, she wasn't able to grieve properly telling herself to "not cry," because she felt like she didn't deserve to feel sad, is the cruelest aspect of her suffering.

Hae-In was presented as the typical, cold, rich wife. In a way, we all wanted to root for hyun-woo to divorce her, but learning about how her memories of hyun-woo are cotton candy and rose colored little moments (the umbrella, the aquariuam, the visit to his hometown, the bus stop) and how she never wanted to make him suffer broke me. In comparison, Hyun-Woo viewed her coldly in his memories, even if they were pretty happy (with the exception of the field of flowers ig).

The way she cried and reacted to learning that he wanted to divorce her was very telling. To him, it was easy, he can always start over. For her, he was an anchor. She viewed him as the companion who would never take advantage of her emotionally or over money. I don't think she was upset just about the divorce, but the fact that he pretended to love her, concealing the fact, that it made her scared to trust him. She doesn't know whether his actions are obligatory or sincere.

Granted, both sides should have communicated better. But I'd like to point out that Hae-In appreciated the small gestures, she noticed the small acts of kindess, while Hyun-Woo focused on her external facade.

Both of them are in love with each other still, it's evident, but I can't help but feel so betrayed with Hae-In over the betrayal, because imagine suppressing your sadness so you don't burden the people around you, enduring your mother's harshness/ being punished for marrying for love, learning you're dying in three months to which there is no cure and learning that the only person who you can count on to be your supporter, your husband, never loved you during your lowest moment of your life. That would break anyone's spirit tbh.

but not in a good way

TW: assault mention in regards to Grace’s ability & her controlling James

This has been on my mind for a while and I wanted to try to articulate it into words. I will be discussing MY PERSONAL OPINION that the gracelet was a cheap ploy at relationship drama, written in a way that makes James and Cordelia’s relationship 100% redeemable.

I’ll be talking about The Midnight Heir, where it is mentioned that James has the bracelet on, but we are unaware of what it means. This was written long before TLH was written and many things have obviously changed, especially Grace and James’s characters and their dynamic. From TMH, without awareness of the bracelet, we are given an extremely different take of Grace that has been given in TLH.

Grace was pictured at first as innocent and tempting (gross) and then after Magnus is leaving the house, she threatens him with a blade after he asks her if she needs help to get away from Tatiana. Her attitude is very different from how she is in TLH, and Magnus comes to a conclusion that Grace kind of led James on a bit, that he declared his love for her, and then she cruelly rejects James.

Let’s talk about if the bracelet did not exist, and The Midnight Heir presumably had the energy that James and Grace originally had before the TLH story changes. If there was no bracelet, and James and Grace’s childhood “love story” was similar, except that James loves Grace FOR REAL, with the bracelet nonexistent. She only leads him on because of Tatiana making her, and to hurt him, she cruelly rejects him and he is heartbroken, acting out the way he does in TMH. This would presumably make him desperate enough to do anything she tells him to do, which is all manipulation to control him for Tatiana. Therefore, there is absolutely no assault, but Grace is not a good person still. I just personally think, and I think many others think this as well, that the assault aspect of Grace’s power has rendered her whole ability unnecessary and, in my opinion, should not have been included in the novel. There is a way to make her a manipulative, terrifying, and cunning enemy without assault, especially if the goal is to give Grace a redemption arc. This could have easily been done by just keeping Grace’s same energy from TMH but just WITHOUT THE BRACELET! (I absolutely hate the ploy of using assault to basically eliminate one of the people from a love triangle and narrow down who the endgame really will be.)

Too many aspects and relationships were wrapped up in a nice, neat bow.

Most importantly, that final battle should've had higher stakes. I was genuinely worried about Anna and Ari for a moment but that passed quickly. Alastair and Matthew should've been in more danger protecting Cordelia.

Maybe we shouldn't've have known or foreshadowed less about Cortana's healing abilities when Cordelia was a paladin. Like- James STABBED himself in the heart. But I knew he'd be okay. The stakes just weren't there for me to be worried.