hm. egg in me

i have so many fragmented thoughts about blade runner 2049. questions. musings. i can't stop thinking about that scene of k and joi in the rain. she says "i'm so happy when i'm with you" and he replies "you don't have to say that." he buys an ai girlfriend who can be Whatever You Want Her To Be! and he just gets the store model. doesn't bother to change her appearance. she's just a thing, but he's also just a thing. he doesn't like real girls. he doesn't want to be human. not until he thinks he really might be. "to be born is to have a soul" he says, meaning he doesn't think he has a soul, and he doesn't think joi has one either, and he's fine with that. he puts her in an emanator so she can go wherever she wants. that's what he says. not "you can always be with me" (she is artificial intelligence programmed to be into him!!!) but "you can go anywhere you want". he can't set her free but he can give her the illusion of freedom, which is the same thing he has. an object masquerading as a person. "i'm so happy when i'm with you" says the computer program. "you don't have to say that" says the soulless replicant because he knows she can't feel happy, he knows she's programmed to say that, he didn't change any of her settings, it wasn't about that. he didn't buy a lover. didn't even buy a friend. just bought a program pretending to be a person. and then gave her the chance to experience the world like a person does. she isn't one. neither is he. but that's the point.