It's Just A Spark

The witches have come to lay their claim.

a pair of mischievous goblins examine their new charge

Ebony and Tenebrous were aghast.  “Did you hear what those fairies gave her? Beauty, grace and willingness to please? Bast’s tits, that’s a terrible thing to do to a kitten.“ Ten got up on her hind legs. “Never trust a flying thing that gives you a mouthful of glitter when you catch it. Come on, Eb, let’s give her our gifts.” “Like half a shrew? I tried giving her that, her dam shouted at me.“ “Quite right too,“ said Ten wisely, “it’s got be at least four weeks before she can manage the skulls. That’ll be my gift then. May you always be able to manage skulls. Big ones, small ones, beaky ones, mousey ones, any sort of skull.“ Ebony copied her sister’s pose. “And may you always catch the flying things. Then you’ll never be hungry, and that’s much better than fairy wishes.” *** Thirty years later, Alba was everyone’s favourite keeper at the zoo. Not only could she cure her colleagues’ headaches just by telling their skulls to give over, but she was the only person they’d ever know who could work alone in the emu enclosure…

YES THIS IS BEAUTIFUL

*hits on you* *actually hits you*

Some people will have no fucking idea how funny this is if they haven’t heard the story.

It is a LITERAL thousand-year-old myth that once, when a giant stole Mjolnir to force Freya to marry him, Thor somewhat successfully impersonated the goddess of love and beauty (with Loki as his lovely handmaiden full of excuses as to why she ate an entire ox at dinner) and participated in a fake wedding to get it back.

This comic meant a whole lot to me. It was sincere in its depiction and treated the issue through the eyes of a grounded person. Not some godly hero saying everything is better than it seems, but a person trying his best before bringing her somewhere who can actually help.

The fucking mobile game ad. the burn. im crying

Love seeing little pawprints. So fucking magical. There was a little guy here.

What a beautiful octopus.

Behold, an octopus

depression and being in the closet stole my teenage years from me so if you catch me doing some juvenile shit in my late twenties mine your own damn business

me talking to myself trying to justify spending $12 on dice that glow in the dark 

I'm 36. I'm a combat veteran. And I'm in love with cutesy pink ruffled kawaii shit.

Me trying to be polite to men

being in your 20’s is like “if I can just get through this week I’ll be ok” but every fucking week