— fall in line.

Metallica is a heavy metal band, the Polar Prize is a music prize. Previous winners include Stevie Wonder, Ennio Morricone and Bob Dylan. Cool works.

I’ve heard of Metallica, I’m not a martian. I just don’t know their stuff. Following in some pretty decent footsteps, congrats to them.

JAMES: Are you ever going to let it go?

JAMES: Feels like both can be answered with 'no'

Chipper always makes me think of wood chippers which then makes me think of Fargoajpfea! And I’ve been all over the US! My parents and I travel a looooot. This is my first time living on my own.

I have no idea what the fuck Fargoajpfea is, but I hate it regardless. Where have you lived other than here?

VERA: It's not a competition you weirdo!

VERA: Yeah, I get the feeling honestly. I almost went out tonight but then I showered after work and realized all I could manage was an over sized t shirt and that's not really bar attire, no matter how cute I look in it.

MAD: It shouldn't be, your instant answer should always just be "Mad."

I’m off for the next three days, and I think it’s the perfect excuse to get shitfaced. Anyone want to join me on this glorious adventure?

Three days off? Must be nice. Especially if you’re planning to spend all three days fucked up. Let me know how that goes, yeah?

It’s Father’s Day today and Lily keeps asking me where her Daddy is so she can give him the card she made and I just…But I want to say Happy Father’s Day to all the Dad’s out there looking after their kids and to the Mom’s too who might be doing it on their own. 

Where is he?

So I sat on the bus back home from work yesterday when this sweet guy took a seat in front of me. He smiled, so I smiled back and we started talking. Right before he reaches his stop he said he had wanted to tell me something the whole time. At which point he points out that there’s a screwdriver in the lazy bun I made. Which probably explains me searching for it about an hour earlier. And also why he started talking to me in the first place.

I’d like to dedicate this story to my parents and their everlasting question of “How come you’re still single, June?” This. This is why. 

Question: How the fuck do you get a screwdriver stuck in your hair? And how do you get one stuck there without even noticing it? What kind of extra strength shit is your hair made out of?

HELLO TYBEE! Cassia here and it’s been a gazillion and a half years since I’ve been here but I’ve finally unpacked the last of my things and can safely say I’m 1,000,000% moved in! How is everyone? People up to no good? Have crazy stories? Bored and want someone to chat with? Because that’s basically me right now. 

You’re too chipper, this post alone is giving me some kind of cavity... Where have you been that it’s been “a gazillion and a half years” since you’ve been in Tybee?

Metallica won the Polar Music Prize yesterday which is amazing but I’m still blown away by that cover of ‘Enter Sandman’ like… damn.

I have absolutely no idea what to say to this, considering I know nothing about Metallica or Polar Music Prize... But I mean, cool?

I don’t know exactly how it happened but I ended up at a karakoe lunch thing today. I didn’t think Frank Ocean and a tuna sub would be such a good combination. I should’ve known though. It’s a tuna sub. It’s always good.

Karaoke lunch? Wild. Karaoke usually works out better when all of the audience and participants are wasted. Did they at least give out mimosas?

I’m thinking about getting a tattoo, maybe even giving it to myself but there is a catch. I’m not a professional, I’ve only ever practiced on dummies, and I could screw it up just as easily as I could get it to come out nice. That being said, it’s gonna be small so if anything I’ll just have a memory of my first ever work on an actual human being, that human being being myself and it’d be a good story. 

Yeah, I’m smarter than I seem to be at the moment. 

Don’t people usually practice on things like grapefruits and orange skins? Do some more practicing on one of those before you try to ink yourself... That shit is on you for life.

JESSIE: HEY HI

JESSIE: So idk how to tell you this but I found some of your nudes online?????

[PAUSE.]

JESSIE: JOKES.

JESSIE: I have not seen your nudes.

JESSIE: Unfortunately.

JESSIE: ALSO KIDDING AGAIN

JAMES: So apparently I'm becoming an old fart, so I'm drowning my sorrows.

JAMES: Feel very free to come and join me. Drinks are on me.

VERA: Pretty sure it's a type of cinnamon. It's also the name of a cute girl I met at the gym.

VERA: You should have asked earlier, I would have, but clearly I was an afterthought and now I already have plans! Have fun with the drool!

MAD: I googled right after I mentioned it, you right. Cuter than me?????

VERA: I think Cassia is gonna come over and use the jacuzzi. You?

MAD: Isn't that some kind of spice? I'm pretty sure my mom uses cassia in something she makes.