At this very moment in my life I lack a crucial part of what's been holding me together. INSPIRATION. How is this possible you ask? STRESS. Besides insanity and violence, stress, in my opinion, is the number one cause of death. Whether it be mental, emotional or physical. As I struggle too write this post I'm at a loss of words, thoughts and actions. The words that could change my life are currently buried deep in my mind and although I've been overwhelmed by my thoughts lately, none of them seem too breed any ingenious reflections. As of right now I'm searching for meaning within myself. What is my purpose? Why do I feel like I posses a gift that has knowingly become the same curse that I find myself trapped within? Is this suppose too happen? Is there a such thing as premeditated success? And if so should I force greatness or wait for IT.... questions I find me asking myself. Maybe I'm just trippin. Maybe I'm not stressed. Maybe I'm not as creative as I once thought I was. Maybe, just maybe IT'S not meant too be. Or maybe IT IS meant too be. Maybe I am stressed. Maybe I'm not tripping. Maybe.... just maybe. But tell that to the young afro-american man who works the grave shift as a supervisor at cvs/pharmacy for a check, that once the government (who I greatly despise) taxes, shouldn't even be considered a check. Tell that to the young man who, lately, has been the foundation for numerous souls who haven't given up but also don't see a reason too keep fighting. You see, I've been so caught up in trying too succeed I've lost sight of what's real. Instead I see my world going to hell, in coach seats, on the same flight that claimed a date all of its own, 9/11. I see a generation of young people who have no logical sense of direction or morals. I see the homeless man who can't afford his peace of mind. I see the girl who battles life and death with her health everyday, but lacks the most important armor, health insurance. I see my fam struggle to make ends meet only too have them separate a few bills later. I see no end to this madness. I see all these things but I see no inspiration because its hard for the helpless to inspire if the helpless needs too be inspired themselves. Its ironic though, how I've lost sight of whats real because what IS real is TOO real for my young mind too process without malfunctioning at least once or twice. So as I continue too punch the clock I will continue too roll my weed for MY peace of mind. As I continue too do for others I will continue too do for myself because the blind will lead the blind astray if there is no one there too guide them. As I continue too search for my meaning in life I will continue too pray, practice as well as keep my faith. And I will continue too do all these things because the inspiration that I seek? Can only be found within myself.... With that being said who will YOU inspire today? -Diskrete
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