stone cold sober, looking for bottles of love

PRIVATE

private:

"I try to, he resists, but he's a black cat who hates everything." She pulled out her phone to show Mac a picture of her cat, Eddie looking cranky in a pumpkin shirt. "He gets cold easily too."

Mac laughed softly as they moved their head to look at the photos of Tina's cat that she was showing them. "Well he looks adorable even if he hates it." They nodded slowly, "My dog, Ace, I think he'd start a riot if I tried to put him anything that wasn't his harness to go on a walk."

Yeah I think he does, he only has me so it's kind of a good job I am around so much. Oh that sucks, sorry to hear your mom wasn't around much, my parents were and I got very lucky. Thank you. Well it's good that they didn't have to amputate, glad you have made a recovery.

It's okay, I stopped being mad at her about it a long time ago, it's not like she meant to be a terrible mom, she's just... ill. And that's not her fault. Yeah thanks, don't get me wrong losing my dreams and my career sucks, but not as much as it would've sucked if I'd have lost my leg too.

I mean, your hair is pretty awesome too. What's your routine? Maybe I should grow it out again. Sounds like a plan. Just don't sell it until I die.

Thanks man, I am pretty proud of it honestly, took me a long time to grow it out in my post basketball days. Nothing special really, washing it in cold water, giving it a deep condition once a week, my sister talked me into using this hair oil stuff too a few times a week, and y'know what it, it does make it more luscious I can't lie. You got it, I'll get it framed or something to keep it in good shape

You'll have better luck coming into the store or calling during business hours. The number of people who forget their wallets, water bottles, Costco membership cards, and chastity belt keys is so astronomically high, I can't keep track of everything. We have a lost and found just for times like this. Someone may have turned it in after swiping all of your credit cards, if you're lucky.

I'm sorry... chastity belt keys? Has that happened more than once? Aren't people supposed to, y'know, keep track of those? Also how would they know it's the key that goes with theirs, like do they have to test it there and then? I have so many questions...

Tell me more.

Oh, okay, um... okay, so there's English poet called Lord Byron, kind of a weird dude but wrote some really beautiful stuff, and while he was studying and living at Trinity College which is this super fancy university in London, he wanted a dog right? And they had this policy about no dogs being allowed, so instead of idk getting a petition going or whatever, he went to a county fair and bought a bear, because it wasn't a dog and therefore he wasn't breaking any rules by keeping it as a pet. Which is both lowkey insane, and also kind of badass???

Excuse me, why don't I know you? @mac-ancheese

Uh... I don't know, I've not been back in LA that long... do you want to know me?

Uh, that's amazing! I have fabulous hair that I work hard for so I will totally rock that commercial. I owe you big time. Want a signed headshot? That's all I have to offer. I can also offer my mom, Paula de la Cruz's headshot.

Yeah I did remember your hair when the guy was pestering me, figured you'd probably be great for it. Nah, you don't owe me anything, I was just grateful to give him someone else to ask about it. Uh... sure, why not, that way when you career blows up I can be one of those people that brags about knowing you before you were famous

"Thank you!" Tina grins and puts the item into her cart. "Good" She reaches her hand out for the other person to shake. "I'm Tina by the way. "

Mac gives her a lopsided grin as they shake Tina's hand, "Mac. It's nice to meet you Tina. Do you usually put your cat in shirts or is it like a special occasion thing?"

PRIVATE:

private:

PRIVATE

private:

Thank you. Its a talent i have perfected.

You can tell. Nah, I think mine was basketball, if that even counts, and I can't do that anymore so... life of a muggle for me, but it's chill. I kinda like quiet and uneventful

honestly i think it'd trigger me so bad to be at his place again...so....the dollywood trip sounds amazing. i'm so down. the hands are tinier than ever but the talent is very big. i have a little girl in third grade who just might have perfect pitch already.

Got it, no b+e then. Dollywood it is, we can make like a week of it when winter break rolls around, it'll be dope. That is adorable honestly, perfect pitch at 8/9 is insane, you've got the next Kelly Clarkson on your hands.

"Excuse me, can you reach that cat shirt in the size medium? I think my cat might be a size medium now. And uh wow you're so tall and gorgeous. I swear I'm not creepy, but I just wanted you to know. " @mac-ancheese

"Sure, here you go." [they reach up to grab the shirt before shrugging, running a hand through their hair] "Well I'm definitely tall, I'll give you that. Not creepy at all by the way, unexpected, but not creepy, you're good."

Yeah he is a very lucky boy.

Honestly that's a really great reason to stop, I'm sure your kid appreciates you being around so much for him. My mom was never really around when I was growing up, so trust me when I say you've definitely made the right and selfess call, and that makes you a great dad in my books. Yeah it was a long ass recovery, but I'm doing okay now. Like I said, it still has it's moments now, but considering they were initially talking about maybe having to amputate, it could have been way worse.

Hey, I love history. You can nerd out to me about Salem any time.

Oh if you love history then there's so many things I can nerd out about. Like if I wasn't an english professor I'd be a history one, I love that shit.