mk jem

fuck it . i'm formatting crimson rivers into book text

i think a fun way to cause chaos in the marauders fandom would be 2 start posting about a new ship that's called "____flower" like "starflower" or "flowerchaser" or "moonflower" or "braveflower" or something where it could be like 16 different pairings and then every time someone asks tell them it's a different pairing but also hype it up so much that people can't ignore it so within 2 days everyone is posting about "braveflower" but everybody posting abt it thinks it's a different ship so people start arguing over who's right and going "ummmm no actually it's THESE characters" and then somebody else is like "wait i thought it was these characters." people go to the ao3 tags to try to figure it out but i have anonymously posted 20 different oneshots with the tag all of which are different pairings so nobody knows. everyone is trying to figure out where tf this ship came from but because it's now such a tangled internet web it's almost impossible to figure out who started posting abt it. people are getting angry and cancelling each other if they ship different versions of braveflower and claiming that their ship is morally superior bc someone else's characters are sibling-coded so it's incestuous but that person says oh yeah well your characters have a three-year age gap and that's problematic and then someone else is like ummmmm ur characters hated each other in canon so it doesn't even make sense and then everyone gets mad at that person for citing canon and it becomes such a cesspool of infighting that nobody's even trying to figure out what the ship was actually supposed to be any more they're all just arguing with each other and writing call-out posts cancelling anyone who doesn't ship their version of braveflower. after three days the entire portion of the fandom that uses fancy shipnames is in shambles but a few intrepid souls emerge from the rubble and wreckage determined to figure out where this all started. they eventually manage 2 trace the whole thing back 2 rollercoasterwords.tumblr.com but by the time they get here my blog has been completely wiped. it's gone. deleted. i'm a ghost in the wind. my ao3 fics? also gone. it's like i never existed at all. but every day the number of braveflower fics goes up. someone keeps anonymously posting them. every single one is a different pairing. who's doing it? nobody knows. nobody will ever know. the perfect crime.