first swim!

Discoholic 🪩
wallacepolsom
Sweet Seals For You, Always
taylor price
DEAR READER

Kiana Khansmith
Today's Document

tannertan36
Jules of Nature
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
Misplaced Lens Cap

if i look back, i am lost
Keni
noise dept.
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
Claire Keane

⁂

★

ellievsbear
seen from United States

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seen from United States
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seen from Vietnam
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seen from Malaysia

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@lordbronious
first swim!

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The best tea is green tea but also I steep it for far longer than is reasonable and use at least 3x the recommended amount of leaves. I won't be happy with my tea experience unless I can really taste the green.
I wanna taste the bitters. "But Natalie green tea isn't supposed to be bitter" fuck off you're just jealous
People who like their beverages to quote-unquote "taste good" say to steep the leaves for a correct amount of time but listen: I'm a monster. I like garbage. I want that water to turn all sorts of fascinating colors b/c I'm a growing girl and I need all the Nutrience
Be like soil, imbibe the bitter tannins, gain Nutrience
This is the Way
“Why should I retract my claws for you? What do I earn from playing nice? I’ll choke on the cries I leave in my throat. I am not sorry. If I am angry, I will be angry. I will be blinding light I will be rage and shaky hands I will be venom and teary eyes I will not laugh at your jokes I will not tuck my fangs away to smile for you. I will look you dead in the eye and I will spit out teeth that are not mine”
— Jasmine Khaliq, “Ammit”
me when i see a cat: CAT! cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat
Fun fact: when I see cute animals, I forget English and automatically revert to my native Hungarian. I don’t know what bystanders make of me, reciting guttural gibberish to rabbits.
But the real question is, what are you SAYING to the rabbits? Is it ‘RABBIT! rabbit rabbit rabbit rabbit rabbit rabbit bunny bunny bunny awww cute bunnyyyyy’?
Well, I usually say the Hungarian equivalent of ‘bun bun bun lil bun look at your tiny spoon-shaped ears awww bun brave little lawnmower bun’, but sometimes I say ‘hey rabbits, my sister’s gonna go to med school’ because I think everyone should know.
I live in Japan, and I always revert to English to talk to small animals, and I was cooing at this tiny little fluff machine of a puppy in baby english like “hello you’re so cute such a cute hello hello yess you’re good” and the 70 year old Japanese lady that was walking him started to *translate the baby talk english into Japanese* for her pup. She wanted to be sure he understood it too.
https://xkcd.com/231/
ACCURATE.
I was at a pet store with Eileen. A woman walked up to us and asked if she could pet her. Eileen’s collar has ‘Deaf Dog’ embroidered on it. The lady asked about it, I confirmed, yes, she’s deaf. The lady immediately switched to American Sign Language and asked her how was her day, was she being a good girl, she’s so pretty. Eileen is wagging her tail excitedly, knowing that someone is talking to her.
Microsoft announces it will shut down ebook program and confiscate its customers' libraries
Microsoft has a DRM-locked ebook store that isn’t making enough money, so they’re shutting it down and taking away every book that every one of its customers acquired effective July 1.
Customers will receive refunds.
This puts the difference between DRM-locked media and unencumbered media into sharp contrast. I have bought a lot of MP3s over the years, thousands of them, and many of the retailers I purchased from are long gone, but I still have the MP3s. Likewise, I have bought many books from long-defunct booksellers and even defunct publishers, but I still own those books.
When I was a bookseller, nothing I could do would result in your losing the book that I sold you. If I regretted selling you a book, I didn’t get to break into your house and steal it, even if I left you a cash refund for the price you paid.
People sometimes treat me like my decision not to sell my books through Amazon’s Audible is irrational (Audible will not let writers or publisher opt to sell their books without DRM), but if you think Amazon is immune to this kind of shenanigans, you are sadly mistaken. My books matter a lot to me. I just paid $8,000 to have a container full of books shipped from a storage locker in the UK to our home in LA so I can be closer to them. The idea that the books I buy can be relegated to some kind of fucking software license is the most grotesque and awful thing I can imagine: if the publishing industry deliberately set out to destroy any sense of intrinsic, civilization-supporting value in literary works, they could not have done a better job.
https://boingboing.net/2019/04/02/burning-libraries.html
If you’ve got an ereader and want to actually own your books, I heartily recommend using cailbre to scrape the DRM off and so you can backup the files.
Cailbre d/l:
https://calibre-ebook.com/download
How to use cailbre to remove DRM:
http://www.geoffstratton.com/remove-drm-amazon-kindle-books
Seconding calibre as a brilliant tool for ebook management in general.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
just learned that magnolias are so old that they’re pollinated by beetles because they existed before bees
They existed *before beetles*
Why is this sad? Why am I sad?
time is too big
I have long said that in order for any comedy to truly succeed as a story, there has to be meat beneath the jokes. There has to be that moment when it is not funny any more.
This. This is that moment.
#honestly even though this is one of the best scripts there ever has been #that is the greatest line #it’s /groundbreaking/ in terms of how it frames vengeance quests; temptation beats; inigo as a comedic figure throughout the movie #you know because this is a happy book (film) that inigo will get his revenge #but will he get JUSTICE #will he get ABSOLUTION #will he get CATHARSIS #those are the things we don’t know #and that line sells it more than any of the previous scene (x)
well now I’m crying
I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING
Best movie ever!
“Cinderblock trying to cheat on her weekly weight check!”
(Source)
@thiscatiscalled
Make a Vampire character who’s lived through several waves of the common language’s development and can’t let go if certain gramatical habbits from different time eras.
So like, thou ist a horrid creature, an absolute cur, but go off i guess
… can i use that phrase irl?
Absolutely you can and I encourage more uses of similar phrases that just completely fuck up the chronology of the english langauge. I wanna hear 15th century english mixed with surfer speak mixed with current age internet lingo like all the time.
Like this? Well my dude, seems like a weasel hath not such a deal of splean as you’re toss’d with. Chill already, you’re not valid.
You are an unrighteous, bastardly gullion. Heaven truly knows that thou art false as hell. When you die, I will face God and walk backwards into hell just so that I can beat your ass in the afterlife too.
I love the idea of a vampire who’s language travels back in time as they get pissed.
I grieve for thee in these trying times. Alexa play Despacito
Reading these is like literary whiplash
This whole post is gold, but the comment about the vampire’s dialect “devolving” into older and older periods when he’s angry stood out to me.
It’s a cinematic cliché for a person of any foreign nationality to revert to their native language when angry (I usually see it with Spanish-speaking characters), and my southern accent deepens as I get angrier.
It makes sense that an immortal character who saw the eras of his language change and evolve over time would speak more and more archaically as he got angrier.
Historical linguists decide to get especially ancient vampires pissed off in order to study ancient languages
are you telling me that if I get a 5000yo vampire angry enough I can directly test the glottalic theory?
*Pisses off a vampire so much that they teach me Minoan*
@deadcatwithaflamethrower because a. languages! and b. this made me think of Nizar whose vocal patterns shift all the time depending on his mood/the conversation/how pissed off he is with someone/something!
Also reblogging for the update of *Pisses off a vampire so much that they teach me Minoan*
“Once you’ve got your teeth out of my neck, could you demonstrate what Linear B sounds like…?”

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
goblin cat and squid grandma
reblog if the girl on the right is just as beautiful as the girl on the left
They have teatime on Tuesdays!
omg!!!!! 💛
@spiritspodcast
Your political beliefs absolutely do reflect who you are as a person. End of.
I finished putting together the Irish-American heritage month display and Jesus CHRIST there are so few books about Ireland in our collection?? Once more, I must say:
Oh and for the people who asked me last time what "a lot of stuff" entails
How the FUCK did I forget this
I love The Golden Girls.
Ya’ll don’t have any idea how fucking brave and needed these plot lines were.
This was before Ellen came out.
This was before civil unions.
This was before Don’t Ask Don’t Tell.
This was when your ass could be fired, blacklisted, and shunned with no legal protections for even being hinted at being gay.
And the Golden Girls said “Fuck you, Fuck this, we’re doing it anyway.”

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
one of the psychologists i work with at the hospital told me to “share these pictures around” because he’s really proud of his new lambs, so HERE HAVE A PICTURE OF SOME FRESH SHEEP
Guys please check out these sheep I want to be able to tell him a ton of people saw his fresh sheep
A Tiki bar but instead of appropriating Oceanic cultures and religions, it’s all Garbled Catholic Iconography.
Me *points to cherub*: can you make that but hollow so I can fill it with Mai Tais?
The walls are covered in Lorem Ipsum but if anyone asks, all the staff say it’s a sacred, mystical text.
Bar snacks are all shaped like communion wafers, but, like, salted
You stick your tongue out and a waiter in short shorts and a Roman collar gently places one onion ring on your tongue.
Mini crucifixes instead of drink umbrellas
fun fact: there’s literally a bar with this exact theme in vancouver called hail mary’s! it’s catholic themed and there’s a confession booth and the bathroom is styled like hell