random shit I relate to and like

I’m so sorry man

some of the funniest discourse ive seen on this website is whether its okay to sexualize the terms top/bottom (because minors use them)

please dont sexualize the act of having penetrative sex because my sixteen year old mutual loves to misuse words about it

Manifesting a nice day at the park by driving there

stupid fucking slut hour 

I need to be.... embraced by a girl.... under a blanket.... it’s a necessity

will never forget when i worked in a fast food joint. some customer wrote like “86 cherries” on their mobile order, as like a pretentious way of say no cherries, but the store was run by a bunch of high schoolers who are working their first job so they collectively went “why the fuck does this guy want 86 fucking cherries” and like piled them onto his milkshake

This is sara.

i buried a sword my f*ther made in my back yard YEARS ago and i live on a large plot of land and i can’t for the fucking life of me remember where, is anyone out here psychic enough to point me in the right direction, i’m getting exhausted and can only dig so many fucking holes in a day. yes i’m being serious, i want the fucking sword back

i was going to take a break bc it’s hot and i’ve been playing manual-labour-battleship for going on 3 hours now, but someone just told me “there’s better lies to make up for notes xoxo” so now i ha—i Have to find this sword to deliver it personally up their ass

Girls…are like strawberries

Sometimes they are in the grocery store