i don't know how to get this thing to go

Are you fucking kidding me

i have never been happier 

"you don't like mpreg?" i don't even like fpreg

no no, I realise it, I’m just still driving despite the check engine light being on

Texting the ecologist friend after she gave birth to ask “on a scale of kangaroo to spotted hyena how bad was it”

I want to see more polyamory pride this pride month i'm serious. Stop being weird about people with multiple partners polyamory is awesome and beautiful and queer

not doomed by the narrative but certainly disciplined

put in timeout by the narrative

dommed by the narrative

i can't post anything

ashes to ashes, dust to dust, reeses to pieces

And sluts to sluts.

amen

hate when men complain about how theyre not allowed to be vulnerable and people will be like "and who set that system up?" as a gotcha moment. stop acting like patriarchy was funded by calling in Every Man Ever in a room and letting them all singularly decide if they wanted it. patriarchy hurts everyone in different ways, they're allowed to complain and you shutting them down and telling them to stop complaining are doing exactly what toxic masculinity wants you to enforce

the human body is an engineering marvel. I sneeze in bright light. if I dont get enough sunlight on my skin I get tired and sad and have to drink a lot of milk to fix it. standing too much hurts, but sitting too much also hurts. if I get a virus, my body will increase its temperature in an attempt to cook it, which also cooks my brain cells. toenails exist. I have to turn the radio down to see better when I drive. there are 17 genes dictating what my hair texture is, but it completely changes when the air is too humid. yawning is contagious. there are more species of bacteria living in my body than there are species of birds in the entire world. every few months I grievously injure my neck by "sleeping on it weird." it took seven million years of human evolution to form me, and now I'm afraid of phone calls.

Stop warning me about mature content I'm literally an adult