expensive water you can't afford

this is so sad he doesn’t even know there’s a double barreled shotgun pointed at him

Pacific spiny lumpsucker (Eumicrotremus orbis)

‘how would other people describe you’ why would i know this

I’m gonna do it! I’m gonna do the dishes!

I did it! It sucked but I did it!

"They tried to kill eachother!!" oh my godddd that was only a couple of timessss and they were literally flirtingggg shut uppppp

fujoshis who are not that into men or not into men at all are very funny to me. I loveeeee reading explicit fanfiction about two guys having sex. i see a shirtless guy in real life and i’m like okay so who asked for that

wanna hang out [remembers it's rude to put expectations on people] it's cool if not [remembers people like to know they're wanted] but I'd really like it if you did [remembers selfishness is bad] we can do whatever you want though [remembers that handing someone a blank canvas isn't as effective as providing a suggestion to bounce ideas off of] like sucking each others fingers for example

modern social media should stop offering "sync with your phone contacts to follow them" options and start offering "block all your phone contacts so they never see your account" options

it's always funny to me when ppl act like it's somehow incestuous for characters who consider each other found family/chosen family/whatever u wanna call the trope to date each other, and it's funny for many reasons, but most specifically it's funny because irl when you meet a person and get really attached and decide that you want to be family with them, there's a very popular legally recognized way of doing that & it's called marriage

I think there's some medias that you just cannot meaningfully engage with if your main priority is shipping

(Tired aroace voice, metaphorical cigarette in hand) You don't have to make them kiss... they don't always have to kiss...