Title Coming Soon

horror novel: he sniled, but it wasn't sneetly. it wasn't sneetly at all.

OP wtf does this mean?

what's not clicking

My coffee maker is such a faggot. Every time I use it it whines and moans and groans and pisses all over the place

i think they're called baristas

a book should be $5 a little drink should be $2 and museum access should be free and all hours

Whenever they gave us one of those "read through ALL the instructions before you begin!" trick assignments in school where the steps lead you on an increasingly ridiculous goose chase until the final one tells you to just put your name on the paper and turn it in without doing anything else, I was always like, "Okay, but what's the point? Surely the REAL world won't be anything like this." And then I grew up and discovered that not only is the real world often exactly like that, some people won't even read the first line of the instructions even if they make perfect sense. And these people are called "co-workers"

Not book smart or street smart but a secret third thing.

supid

supid.

nobody is out of your league by the way. not everybody will be into you obviously but thats not because they're better or more valuable than you in any way its just the way things go. you never know who's gonna be into whom. there is literally no such thing as leagues.

In the mood to see my mutuals' hogs today.

if you're attracted to me you're definitely on some kind of spectrum btw

Why is the car smiling at me?

you solve the mystery of what to have for dinner one night and you think "hell yeah case closed forever" WRONG there is a dinner mystery the next night too