LizardHawthorne

it's okay if you as a lesbian want to fuck the straight blonde popstar but you can't be pretending she's a lesbian too girl at least make it a lesbian corruption kink or some shit

There is… a lot going on here.

‎ ‎

Thats the context for this meme???

I feel like I've been robbed the whole time. This is magical.

I'm dying

Real House Husbands of Hollywood with Erica Ash (RIP), Kevin Hart, and Nadine Velasquez. episode: "Badu and Baby Showers."

I am whatever the opposite of a speed runner is. I am a game meanderer. I have to look at literally everything. I am overly cautious in every way. I forget to pause and wander away from the game. I take a minimum 7 hours to get through any given level. If you give me a timer I will cry.

Over the last few days this has become everything to me

we as a society must get more normal about STDs I'm being so serious

we are in an incredible age of medicine where you can easily get most of them treated, you can get vaccinated against some, and even HIV is no longer a death sentence (and i believe a cure is in the works rn). it is not a big deal. be safe, yes, but also don't be a judgy weirdo to people who do get infected because they weren't "being safe." especially because if you do not perpetually mask in public you have less than zero ground to stand on there.

no genuinely I just got a URI and let me tell you I'd gladly take the easily cured disease that pops up on my genitals over agony when I try to breathe that can only have the symptoms mitigated

i’ve mixed cranberry mikes harder and cucumber lime gatorade into a drink i like to call “the flavor” because like. you drink this shit and your tongue is like “there’s a taste here. you are experiencing a flavor” but when you go to open the door there’s no flavor there. it comes back with an undefined error in the flavor column. it’s the missingno of flavors. it so absolutely and definitely tastes like something and that thing is nothing.

Maybe this is why nobody has bothered to reinvent carpentry ever since the bombs fell. The apocalypse all made them lose their desire for creature comforts.

Eh, just an umbrella and a sleeping bag and I’m fine. Don’t need that “door” you made for me.

if stuck in a tight spot, you can lez out with friendly or hostile lizards

i'm getting tired of being the thing i am. i gotta change into a different thing

browsing the tf forums (on my phone because my hands are still really small) looking for ways to reverse my changes but nobody is posting anything helpful