I'll Take Ten

”Eat a salad take a shit and die” is peak apocalypse capitalism

BIG STRETCH

let's practice stretchy-stretch with mama

im having a boner and it's yours

28 year old tumblr users will look at you and say do you remember thwomp day of 2013 when everyone was posting thwomp from mario 64 in different audio

I should quit my job to pursue a life of meaningless violence

whoever's idea it was to have womens t-shirts have those tiny sleeves that go way up into the armpits must have done that maliciously

Men who talk shit about gold diggers underestimate the grit it takes to put up with an insufferable man, even when money is involved. We should be thanking them for their service like they are veterans.

why do people need to be domesticated animals for petplay,. u r my lion i bought you illegallu and you are trying to kill me. go

my problem is if i enjoy something enough i will be nitpicking. i Will have things to say about where and how it failed. out of nothing but love straight from my heart. unfortunately this often makes me indistinguishable from a hater who has never experienced joy or kindness. such is the amateur critic's burden.

hikes are very good yes but a deluxe hike is when you are accompanied by a freak with niche nature knowledge. they’re like omg stop there’s a horned valerian varmint beetle here and then you both get to crouch down and look at a bug like :)