Proud Nerd

I’m telling you elephants are chill motherfuckers. They fucking love being helpful. They once defended a man with heatstroke from a truck that came to rescue him. They knew he was sick, laying against a tree for shade. They were watching over him and petting him, and they threatened to charge the vehicle for coming towards him. Another person passed out, and elephants cried over her and buried her body in a traditional elephant funeral. (Piling branches on her). And were quite spooked when she got up later. And an elephant was helping workers to put logs in holes for a wall. On one hole, the elephant absolutely refused to set the log in, despite being punished and goaded. Turns out there was a sleeping dog in the hole.

I just love that the lioness (a fiercely protective species) was 100% on board with it. 

paul hollywood on bakeoff: now, i can see you’ve had a little trouble with your genoise sponge, haven’t you? the egg whites haven’t been whipped for quite long enough, and it’s lost some of that delicate, airy consistency, which means that your 10,000 spun sugar decorations haven’t got the solid foundation that they really need to support the handcrafted marzipan statue of the virgin mary that you’ve painted with edible gold leaf

Skull face bookseller Honda-san is a god damn gift

you’re right, I am looking a little stiff here, I should try to relax

You call that “chillin”?

I dunno, man,

It’s because the cat is that lynx’s mom

When another gay is hired at your job

When you’re the new gay who just got hired

When the new gay get fired for not doing thier job

When the new gay shows up after getting his job back for blowing the manager

When the district manager fires both of you, and the manager, for starting drama in addition to having inappropriate sexual relationships with management.

When you, the unmentioned fourth gay, sat there and ate your food and watched your messy coworkers get fired for starting unnecessary drama.

When the fired for the second time gay finds out there was another gay the entire time

when you’ve been waiting in line for ten minutes and just want to buy some fucking hand soap

In other news, reading the reviews for Cats has become my new favorite pastime: