âgood Christian honkâ sounds like a euphemismÂ
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@lionphantom
âgood Christian honkâ sounds like a euphemismÂ

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It's fun reading writers who clearly grew up in suburban/urban environments as someone who grew up on a farm because they're always like "oh it was so creepy, woods at night, eerily breathtaking, something was living in there..." and it's like yeah that'll be the deer.
EXACTLY
Same can be said about city streets. Random "gunshot" and "explosion" noises? That's the road construction crew behind the corner. Mysterious howling and barking out of nowhere echoing through the street? That's someone's dumb dog that locked itself out on the balcony on the 3rd floor above you and buildings just happen to have the shape where certain areas just vibrate with echoes from all sides at once. Screeching of car tires and agressive shouting? Fucking teens are at it again.
But the city is the creepiest when it's silent because if there are no cars and no chitchat and no humm of an A/C unit, then where is everybody?
Meanwhile in a rural area if you hear a gunshot that's actually a gunshot
It's nothing to worry about though, unless you hear a long, screaming NYOOM accompanying it. The Looney Tunes sound effect for flying bullets is legitimately almost what bullets flying past your head actually sounds like.
ENCHANTED (2007) dir. Kevin Lima
do the spiderverse kids all have. slightly different meme cultures
miles: look I can fit my whole fist in my mouth
gwen: freaky flexing. but alright
miles:
miles, through his fist: Iâm sorry what did you just say
ok but remember Peter Bâs world is most like ours
 so both Miles and Gwen would have slightly off memes and distress him when he has a hard enough time remembering his own worldâs memes
I WAS HOPING SOMEBODY WOULD POINT THIS OUT.
Miles: Itâs âstrange flex but cool beans.â Peter: Am I tripping on something? Is this a stroke, is this what a stroke feels like?
Miles: *makes a mistake* This is distressing. Siri play Take on Me.
Gwen: you absolute heathen. Itâs âThis is tragic, google play All Star.â
Peter: whAT the fUCK
THATâS IT THIS ONE IS THE BEST ONE
noir: strange flaunt, but alas
Noir:
Youâve done it - you found something that fits the format but holds the meaning âfuck Nazisâ.
spiderham: hmm disappointing, jukebox play whatâs new pussycat

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I wish more cartoons taught young girls that if a man harasses you or annoys you or whatever you should blow him up with a bazooka and feel no remorse :)))
Ivy leaned back to avoid the propulsion blast. Theyâve done this before.
Ivy leaned back to
avoid the propulsion blast.
Theyâve done this before.
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
Shit like CG live action style Mufasa prequel has fully shifted me from "not everything has to be for me!" to "some movies are such a waste of space I wish I could undo their whole existence and punish whoever greenlit the idea"
It's all just so miserably joyless now, my love of fantasy just totally clocks out. I can go back and look at ostensibly the worst animated films from decades ago like A Troll in Central Park or something and I think "this is terrible but the whole production obviously believed in it so earnestly and I would die to protect Don Bluth"
Then I see clips from Disney's CG Pinocchio and I want to tell this movie to grow up and get a real job
was gonna keep in tags but go watch this if u havent. because the new lion king is actually a soulless cash grab that threw artistic integrity to the side while stripping the original film of everything that made it a success. Its not just a case of ânot everything has to be for meâ its a case of the film being an actual disgrace from its conception to its production.Â
and ALL the live action remakes suffer this fate to some degree, some more so than others
https://youtu.be/btNL1q-yU7E
she's everything
Ok I love this???
"baptise me in hot dog water"
Hot dog water - there's a Tumblr post out there I've seen saying hot dog water is the opposite of holy water, due to the fact that a single drop of it will contaminate what it touches. I assume this was partly inspired by this allusion but who knows for sure.
Also the the idea of holy water as inhuman and cleaning vs hot dog water as the remains of feeding someone - often a child - and entirely human. It may be dirty and I do not want it on me but God hot dog water has some memories. You will not wash away my sins. They're mine. Also, anyone can make hot dog water but holy water is refined, restricted (yes anyone can make it in an emergency but lay people are restricted from it)
"you and I both know"
Unlike baptism for babies, this one is done between two people who are both aware of what is happening. The one receiving the baptism gives the orders about what they want to happen. The giver and receiver are portrayed as equals. They are equally aware of their humanity.
"the holy stuff won't take"
Ooof heartbreaking, amazing line. Raises so many questions. What does it mean when the water "takes"? What has the receiver done that makes them unfit for holy water? Or, what has the holy water done that makes it to weak to help, to be a part of your life?
The poem as a whole - I love the lack of capitalization. It adds a sort of intimacy to the poem, and the statement from the speaker. The high words "baptise" and "holy" being offset by "take" and "hot dog". Also "hot dog water" vs "holy stuff." The cadence! I would lick it.
I love the serious analysis, and I think I find it persuasive.
This also sheds a lot of light on some plot points in Scooby Doo! Mystery Incorporated.
Not to turn this into another house full of chintz, but I'mma fuck this poem on the floor.
Meter
There are two readings of the poem's meter that I immediately identify, the first is how I'd want to read it, and the second is how a normal person would probably read it, but both make the same point.
In my interpretation (left), the first line is four wholely irregular feet: an iamb into a dibrach into two trochees; The second line is two trouches into a hanging stressed syllable; And the third line is three iambs.
In the more normal interpretation(right), the first line and second line are six trochees all together plus that hanging syllable in 'knowing' which transitions the poem to iambic trimeter.
And look at the interesting result of that laid bare:
In English poetry there's a tradition, all other things being equal, that iambs are considered the sophisticated foot with trochees often being contrasted as the vulgar or common foot.
The vulgar in specificity "hot dog water" is put in trochee, while the respectably vague "the holy stuff" is afforded iambs. Without the poet having thought of the stress things the pattern actively, this incapulation of the English poetic tradition is astounding. Especially when you consider the
Chiasmus
Chiasmus is a figure of rhetorical construction, in which two pairs of ideas are laid across each other, A B B A. It's one of the more popular figures of rhetoric and if you're looking for it you'll see it everywhere.
In the most literal sense, it's about repetition; but, you can apply it more liberally to ideas, thoughts, or in this case, parts of speech:
The nouns and verb pairs in the first and third lines crossover each other. They are in chiasmus. Structurally, the inversion makes the poem feel more solid, while still furthering emphasizing the contrast between the idea of hot dog water and the holy stuff.
Opening with a command and closing with a result.
#exquisite taste here with the maruman mnemosyne. may I ask about the ass in the corner however @mamoru
in my defense. that's for another post that's in my queue. however. i live alone. and i saw Only your tags first without the photo
so you can imagine my surprise. and my potential terror. when you were talking about an ass in the corner
Oh my god he's a little udon noodle he's a little aburaage I'm fucking losing it

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Cinderella (1950)
Anastasia (1997) dir. Don Bluth, Gary Goldman
Jodi Benson and Halle Bailey aka two iconic Ariels! THE LITTLE MERMAID (1989 | 2023)
đđđ¸â¨
this overwatch 2 voiceline dragged me back to the fandom singlehandedly.

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Barbie (2023) + the internet
bonus:
ok this is âearring magic kenâ who was introduced in 1992 (and discontinued shortly thereafter)
basically mattel had done a survey and discovered that girls didnât think ken was âcoolâ enough
SO someone had the bright idea to research coolness by sending people to raves which, at the time, were mostly hosted & attended by gay men. so they went to these raves and took notes on what the fashions were and finally landed on this outfit, mesh shirt & allÂ
this doll became the best selling ken doll in history, mostly because gay men bought it in droves. (many of them said his necklace was supposed to be a cockring) but mattel and a number of parents werenât very amused and discontinued the dollÂ
OH MY GOD YOUâRE LEAVING OUT THE BEST PART
SO
MAGIC EARRING KEN. This bitch gay as HELL. supposedly the aforementioned rings on him are for âmagic earringsâ and clip on charms. These charms are advertised as totally COMPLETELY heterosexual, not gay at ALL, see thereâs a Barbie that also has Magic Earring Action with clip on charms! Ken wears them to match, because heâs STRAIGHT
Hereâs the issue: THERE IS NO MATCHING BARBIE. Magic Earring Ken is out here straight up wearing cock rings on his jacket with a thinly devised advertising ploy to make it SEEM not-gay. But itâs DEFINITELY GAY. (And if youâre thinking, why cock rings? Well way back in 1992 gay culture was HUGE on wearing cock rings, it was the in-style. Everyone who was gay wore one, even women; you sewed them to your leather jacket, and the placement indicated some of your sexual preference. In case you were wondering, Ken is a Bottom.)
AND IT GETS BETTER. Magic Earring Ken was on the shelves for six weeks before they pulled him. In that short amount of time? Magic Earring Ken became the BEST SELLING Barbie Doll Mattel has EVER SOLD. LET THAT SINK IN. SIX WEEKS. And now every time these wheezy old hetero windbag execs go to look at their sales board, theyâre forever haunted by Magic Earring Ken at the top of their charts.
Gay as hell, Cock Ring Bottom Ken, the Best Selling Mattel Doll. Pride.