Balancing Life and Being Pre-Med

As I finish up my sophomore year, I’ve been thinking a lot about how much has changed since I first started college. Going into this, I knew being on the pre-med track would be challenging, but I don’t think I fully understood what that would actually look like day to day.

This year, especially, has pushed me in ways I didn’t expect. Balancing multiple science courses, managing my time, and dealing with the pressure to maintain strong grades has not been easy. Finals week really brought all of that together. On top of that, I’ve also been thinking more seriously about the future, things like medical school requirements, certifications, and how being an out-of-state student adds extra complications.

At the same time, this has honestly been one of my favorite years. I’ve had a lot of great experiences and grown in ways I didn’t expect. But even with that, I can also tell how burnt out I feel right now. Between classes, everything related to pre-med, and my leadership position in my sorority, it’s been a lot to handle at once. That role, especially, has been more draining than I anticipated, even though it’s been meaningful.

Right now, I feel like I just need a short break to reset—just going home, relaxing for a couple of days, and stepping away from everything before starting work again. It’s strange to feel both proud of everything I’ve done and completely exhausted at the same time, but that’s kind of where I am.

One thing I’ve been noticing more lately is how much anxiety starts to build as finals week gets closer. It’s not just one exam to prepare for, it’s multiple classes, all with cumulative material, all scheduled within a short period of time. That alone makes it feel overwhelming.

Being on the pre-med track adds another layer to that stress. It’s hard not to think about how important grades are and how much they can impact future opportunities. I’ve worked really hard to maintain a 4.0 so far, and the thought of losing that because of one difficult week is honestly something that’s been on my mind a lot. Even when I try to stay focused on just doing my best, that pressure is still there in the background.

I’ve been trying to stay organized and keep up with studying, but it can be difficult when there’s so much to cover at once. Sometimes it feels like no matter how much time I spend reviewing, there’s always more I could be doing.

At the same time, I know this is something most students are dealing with right now, especially in more demanding majors. It doesn’t necessarily make it easier, but it does make it feel a little less isolating.

One thing I’ve been thinking about more lately is how being an out-of-state student adds another layer of difficulty to everything. College is already expensive, but paying out-of-state tuition makes it even more stressful, especially when I’m also thinking about the cost of medical school in the future.

It also affects things beyond just tuition. I’ve learned that medical schools in this state are more likely to accept in-state students, mostly because those students are more likely to stay and practice there. That makes the whole process feel a little more complicated, since I’m not originally from here and it feels like I’m already at a disadvantage.

Even smaller things end up being more difficult than I expected. For example, if I get certifications at home in Massachusetts, like my EMT certification, I’d have to transfer it to South Carolina if I want to actually use it while I’m at school. The same goes for taking classes—if I want to take anything online or at a different school, I have to check course equivalency forms and get permission ahead of time.

On Saturday I went to the beach with my friends, and it was honestly really nice to just get out for a bit. With everything going on lately, I haven’t really been giving myself much time to relax, so it felt good to have a day that wasn’t all about school.

Now I’m back studying for my orgo exam tomorrow, and it feels like I’m trying to make up for lost time. I keep thinking about how I need to do better on this exam than I did on the first one if I want to keep a high B or possibly get an A, and it’s making everything feel more stressful.

I feel like this is where the FOMO comes in. When I’m studying, I feel like I’m missing out on time with my friends. But when I do take a break and go out, I feel like I’m falling behind and end up stressing about it later. It’s like I can’t fully enjoy either one without thinking about the other.

My recent internal conflict has been trying to decide if I should study abroad next spring, and I keep going back and forth. There are a lot of pros that make it really tempting. The classes would be easier, I’d get to spend four months in another country with my best friends, and I’d finally have the chance to travel since I’ve never really been out of the country before. It feels like one of those once-in-a-lifetime experiences that I don’t want to miss. Everyone tells me, when you are in your grave, you will never regret seeing the world, you might regret choosing not to.

At the same time, there are some pretty big downsides. Being away for four months would mean no clinical experience, volunteering, or working, which feels stressful when I’m already thinking about building my application. I also wouldn’t be able to run for president of my sorority or take on any leadership positions, which is something I'm already involved in and would like to continue. On top of that, I’d still have to pay rent for my apartment at school, which makes the whole decision feel even more complicated financially.

This week I went to a pig dissection with Women In Healthcare, I didn’t really know what to expect going into it. I have dissected something before, we did a rat in my Biology 102 lab however that was preserved in formaldehyde, so it didn’t really feel the same. Everything was kind of stiff and already “prepared,” if that makes sense. This was completely different. The pig we worked with was from a butcher, and apparently it had been walking around on a farm earlier that day. This wasn’t something preserved for weeks, it was very recent. When we looked at the lungs, you could still see blood and spit bubbles in the trachea.

This week was kind of a surprise. I got my orgo exam back, and I actually did really well on it. I felt good after the exam, however the grade felt like a reward. I feel like ever since starting the pre-med track, I’ve been doubting myself a lot, especially after my advising meeting last week. I kept thinking I was behind or not doing enough, so I went into this exam already assuming it wouldn’t go great, especially after the first exam. But it did, and it made me stop for a second.

This week, I had the chance to meet with my pre-med advisor, and it was honestly a different experience than I expected. My advisor is actually a sophomore at my school who is also on the pre-med track. Seeing someone so close to my own age already so organized and confident in their path made me start comparing myself.

Lately, all I've heard from friends is, "why was it $90 to fill my tank?", or "why is gas so expensive, I thought things were supposed to be cheaper in the south". It's something I've been noticing too, driving is getting way more expensive than it used to be.

From what I understand, there are a few reasons behind this. Gas prices are affected by things like oil production, global conflict, and overall demand. One major factor happening recently is the ongoing crisis in the Middle East. That region plays a major role in global oil supply so any instability there can disrupt production, causing prices to rise.

Overall, it's frustrating how something so essential can be so uncertain. It also shows how connected everything is, since events happening across the world can directly impact our lives in the US.

I've recently started watching the show, Love Story. Love Story is a new series that captures the relationship between John F Kennedy Jr and Carolyn Bessette, one of the most talked-about couples of the 1990s. Their story is extremely fascinating and seems like something you would see in a movie.

What stands out to me about this show is how Carolyn herself is portrayed. The actress Sarah Pidgeon does an amazing job of capturing her energy and personality. She comes across as confident, independent, and powerful. I like how the show highlights that she had her own career and identity, instead of just being JFK jr's wife.

I also admire the way Carolyn handled her personal life, especially when it came to dating and decision-making. She didn't seem like someone who rushed into things or changed herself for someone else. She was under so much pressure from the media, constantly being followed and photographed yet she still carried herself very well.

Overall, the show made me appreciate Carolyn Bessette as an individual, not just as a part of a famous couple. It also put into perspective how different things are now with the influence of social media.