i do not know what i am doing

i got a feeling that it’s gonna be a wonderful day

i still don’t know how this app works but look at me go! today i’m pinning posts, tomorrow i’ll be buying tumblr for 44 billion dollars and destroying it from the inside out

anyway, welcome to my blog, and thank you for your support

my carrd: you can find faqs, social media links, and my commission page here

#lilliangst art: my art

#lilli texts: rambles n stuff

#lilli schl: art assignments that i like

my full piece for @penaconyfashion featuring the characters working in a fashion magazine department!!

leftover sales are open, link here: https://penaconyfashionzine.bigcartel.com/

finally posting my full piece for the hsr masquerade zine!! leftover sales are open link down below !!! (also i just added the print to my etsy shop, link in carrd) crazy posting the full piece on schedule and not 5 years later

i had a lot of fun with these designs

preview of my piece for the penacony fashion zine featuring 13 characters in an office au!! this officially marks my retirement from doing fanzines (at least for hyv content) 🫡 wanted to do another unnecessary complicated piece to wrap it up

link to preorders here!! https://penaconyfashionzine.bigcartel.com/

after 3 years, i can finally post the full piece i did for the eulamber zine 😮‍💨 leftover sales are closing in two days, be sure to check it out if you haven’t!! link down below!! also [edit] i forgot to say but the print of this illustration is also available on my etsy, link in my carrd, which is in my bio!!

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it’s kinda crazy posting the full piece now, 3 years after i made it. this was the first illustration i did with more than 5 people in an image and i was so proud of it at the time, but ive improved so much since then and now theres a lot i don’t like about it 💀 i wish i can move this post back to late 2022 or early 2023

finally, part 10/10 of my senior thesis project !! part 9

The pieces in this series explore the different stages of psychological development that a person may go through in their life, based on Erik Erikson’s theory

STAGE 8: INTEGRITY VS. DESPAIR (65-DEATH)

VIRTUE: WISDOM

The last stage of our lives, where we reflect on the way we lived and the choices we made. Depending on how we feel about our life, we may be accepting or fearful about the thought of death. During this stage, we may revisit much of our past except this time, as an individual with total control. (e.g. old hobbies, reconnecting with people, etc.)

Relationships: Humanity, Self

Events: Retirement, Slowing Down, Self-reflection, Facing Mortality

Outcome: Satisfied and fulfilled with ourselves, the ability to accept death without fear, knowing that our life had a purpose

and there you have it, all 10 pieces posted. been working on this series for the past year and its downright the most taxing project i’ve ever done, partly because of some not-so-good things that happened in my life, partly because I was extremely harsh on myself and wanted everything to be perfect, and partly because i lost nearly all my drive to create for the past 2 years (unfortunately its due to being bombarded with ai and seeing the state of the art industry). but somehow, i pushed through it right before the deadline and i’m happy with most of the pieces.

part 9/10 of my senior thesis project !! part 8

The pieces in this series explore the different stages of psychological development that a person may go through in their life, based on Erik Erikson’s theory

STAGE 8: INTEGRITY VS. DESPAIR (65-DEATH)

VIRTUE: WISDOM

The last stage of our lives, where we reflect on the way we lived and the choices we made. Depending on how we feel about our life, we may be accepting or fearful about the thought of death. During this stage, we may revisit much of our past except this time, as an individual with total control. (e.g. old hobbies, reconnecting with people, etc.)

Relationships: Humanity, Self

Events: Retirement, Slowing Down, Self-reflection, Facing Mortality

part 8/10 of my senior thesis project !! part 7

The pieces in this series explore the different stages of psychological development that a person may go through in their life, based on Erik Erikson’s theory

STAGE 7: GENERATIVITY VS. STAGNATION (40-65 YEARS)

VIRTUE: CARE

As we grow older, we start to focus on giving back to our community and/or nurturing the next generation. We want to leave our mark and change things for the better. Contribution leads to a sense of productivity and accomplishment; by helping others grow, we also grow alongside them.

Relationships: Family, Colleagues, Community, The Younger Generation

Events: Career Developments, Raising Children, Community Work, Creating a Home

part 7/10 of my senior thesis project !! part 6

The pieces in this series explore the different stages of psychological development that a person may go through in their life, based on Erik Erikson’s theory

STAGE 7: GENERATIVITY VS. STAGNATION (40-65 YEARS)

VIRTUE: CARE

As we grow older, we start to focus on giving back to our community and/or nurturing the next generation. We want to leave our mark and change things for the better. Contribution leads to a sense of productivity and accomplishment; by helping others grow, we also grow alongside them.

Relationships: Family, Colleagues, Community, The Younger Generation

Events: Career Developments, Raising Children, Community Work, Creating a Home

part 6/10 of my senior thesis project !! part 5

The pieces in this series explore the different stages of psychological development that a person may go through in their life, based on Erik Erikson’s theory

STAGE 6: INTIMACY VS. ISOLATION (19-40 YEARS)

VIRTUE: LOVE

During this stage, we start to develop lifelong, well-meaning and mutual relationships with others: platonic and romantic. This requires vulnerability, trust, respect, and commitment.

Relationships: Friends, Partners

Events: Romantic Relationships, Friendships

part 6/10 of my senior thesis project !! part 5

The pieces in this series explore the different stages of psychological development that a person may go through in their life, based on Erik Erikson’s theory

INTIMACY VS. ISOLATION (19-40 YEARS)

VIRTUE: LOVE

During this stage, we start to develop lifelong, well-meaning and mutual relationships with others: platonic and romantic. This requires vulnerability, trust, respect, and commitment.

Relationships: Friends, Partners

Events: Romantic Relationships, Friendships

part 5/10 of my senior thesis project !! part 4

The pieces in this series explore the different stages of psychological development that a person may go through in their life, based on Erik Erikson’s theory

STAGE 6: INTIMACY VS. ISOLATION (19-40 YEARS)

VIRTUE: LOVE

During this stage, we start to develop lifelong, well-meaning and mutual relationships with others: platonic and romantic. This requires vulnerability, trust, respect, and commitment.

Relationships: Friends, Partners

Events: Romantic Relationships, Friendships

part 4/10 of my senior thesis project !! part 3

The pieces in this series explore the different stages of psychological development that a person may go through in their life, based on Erik Erikson’s theory

STAGE 5: IDENTITY VS. CONFUSION (12-18 YEARS)

VIRTUE: FIDELITY

This stage takes place during what is arguably the most confusing and volatile time of our lives: our teenage years.

We begin to look to role models, experiment with self-expression, and form personal opinions. We start to question the world around us and our place in it, and this can mean coming face-to-face with past mistreatment and faults. Sometimes this leads to rebellion, which Erikson describes as the most important part of this stage. For those who were unable to develop properly earlier on, this stage is the bridge between childhood and adulthood; it gives us a chance to revisit and come to terms with the past and thus look toward a different future.

Relationships:

Peers, Role Models, Caregivers

Events: Experimentation, Peer Influence, Rebellion, Self-reflection

part 3/10 of my senior thesis project !! part 2

The pieces in this series explore the different stages of psychological development that a person may go through in their life, based on Erik Erikson’s theory

STAGE 4: INDUSTRY VS. INFERIORITY (7-11 YEARS)

VIRTUE: COMPETENCE/CONFIDENCE

We start going to school regularly and spend a lot of time with peers of the same age. As we compare ourselves with them, we develop pride or shame about our abilities and accomplishments. Under the stress of social and academic demands, we need to learn how to regulate our emotions and self-esteem when met with defeat and rejection.

Relationships: Caregivers, Teachers, Peers

Events: School, Examinations, Competitions, Failures, Successes

Part 2/10 of my senior thesis project !! part 1

The pieces in this series explore the different stages of psychological development that a person may go through in their life

STAGE 2: AUTONOMY VS. SHAME/DOUBT (2-3 YEARS)

VIRTUE: WILL

STAGE 3: INITIATIVE VS. GUILT (3-6 YEARS)

VIRTUE: PURPOSE

During these stages, we begin interacting with our environment. In Stage 2, we test our body's ability and limits. We start practicing self-care and taking personal responsibility for our actions. In Stage 3, we start executing our thoughts and ideas and learn about boundaries in the process. This is also the stage where we form our first non-familial relationships. Adulf criticism and encouragement during this time affect our behavior immensely, and we require a balance of both.

Relationships: Caregivers, Teachers, Peers

Events: Toilet Training, Clothing Ourselves, Playing and Exploring Ideas and Creativity

Stage 2 Outcomes: A sense of control over ourselves and the ability to act independently. Or, excessive shame in making mistakes, leading to over-dependence and low self-esteem. Bad sense of boundaries for self and others.

Stage 3 Outcomes: A willingness to try new things, face challenges, and be curious, all while respecting boundaries. Or, guilt about desires, leading to a lack of initiative

Part 1/10 of my senior thesis project which i’ve been working on for the past year !! part 2

The pieces in this series explore the different stages of psychological development that a person may go through in their life.

STAGE 1: TRUST VS. MISTRUST (0-1 YEARS)

VIRTUE: HOPE

At this stage, we are completely dependant on our caregivers for survival. We learn to trust and distrust the world around us depending on if we receive adequate and consistent food, love, warmth, and safety. A balance of knowing when to trust and when to be cautious should be achieved.

Relationships: Caregivers, Adults

Events: Feeding, Caregiving and Abandonment

Outcomes: Develop attachment style to caregivers. Faith that basic needs can be met and that we are safe. Or, anxiety and fear that we are alone and unloved