Lexxi

Today I went on a dog walk with my parents and it was really nice and calming since there was no one around. There was the summer night breeze and the sound of crickets that toed it all together. It was genuinely really nice and it gave me a lot of time to not think about the next few weeks I had planned and instead I was able to let go of some of my worry about starting uni for 3nd year, moving in to my new place, paying bills for the first time and a wedding in Germany I have to attend.

Its nice to stop and look at the flowers along the way and feel the coolness of the evening before returning to the real world.

I was able to clear my mind for a bit too, just enjoying the time rather than ruining it for myself. Just letting my mind be blank for a while was refreshing.

~ Ready for Autumn ~

I just want to dig out my turtle necks and oversized knitted jumpers in all the deep colours of red and oranges and browns to match the autumn colour palette :)

It's just rainy and not very feel-good atm... it makes me feel sad and lethargic although it's nice to have a warm cup of coffee to accompany me

My sister saw my new drawings and she told me she loved them which made my day (probably exaggerating but still made me happy)

She sent me a picture from when we went to a BTS kpop concert and it turned out dead cute she even made it into her phone background ❣❣

Saw the original photo on pinterest and thought that looks damn cool and aesthetic since it had all these 90's vibes.

For practice I tried digitally tracing the photo to try out some styles as well as learn more about the fold of clothing, the way hair falls and body positions.

I'm really happy with the outcome and I'd like to explore more into using the various settings and brushes on illustrator as well as use my own photos to base my drawings on :)))

   ~    P A R T   2   ~   G A R D E N    C E N T R E   ~

Again please repost //comment if you use any of my photos :)

Part 1        ~   GARDEN  CENTER  FIELD TRIP   ~   

I went on a mini field trip the other day to a garden centre and thought it was the perfect opportunity to gather some floral/nature/plant reference photographs that I could use for future uni / graphic design projects or for my personal use.

I think they will be awesome if I drew them digitally or maybe even by hand with paints? ill leave it up to ‘future me’ to decide :)

Make sure to repost or leave a comment if you do end up using any of my photos, It’s always nice to know if it will be helpful to someone else :))

~ D E V I L S D A Y O F F ~

Recently I moved house and it was so stressful and tiring that I wished it would be over quickly.

It was that kinda thought that inspired this idea of the 'devils day off' drawing above.

I posted it on my instagram acc. for my doodles but thought it would be nice to post it on here too :)

The devil sitting in a worn leather armchair, in his PJ's, having a smoke to relax and have some alone time...

I like how it turned out although there are many mistakes that I wish I had corrected but it was too late when I noticed them.

I showed this drawing to my dad and he said that he really liked it and after I told him that I wasn't happy about the mistakes he told me that :

"they make it more original. This isn't a copy but your own work coming from your own imagination so there isn't anything to directly compare it to so the mistakes aren't there because that's the way it's supposed to be" - lil' dad quote

This is something I spent the majority of my afternoon creating :)

I wanted to create some sort of ‘sky// space’’ scene on Adobe illustrator to practice as well as create a piece of work that I could possibly use in future university projects.

This is my own work that I created and spent a lot of time and effort over. I know the concept isn't original but I really tried my best without any type of reference or inspiration from previous works.

 I chose to use only a 4 part colour pallet which I chose based on the songs I was listening at the time which were :

~ ‘satisfied’ by Elijah Blake 

~ ‘stolen moments’ by Cautious Clay

~ ‘Movie’ by Tom Misch

to name a few...

I used a website called: https://colorhunt.co/

I didn't plan it beforehand but did have a general idea of what i was going for, but I personally think that the 2D // Flat design style works very well through the use of gradients and opacity. I think my use of light and shadow is nicely done as I tried my best to think about where the light source was coming from and where the shadows would then be placed, although there are still a few areas where it hasn't worked as well.

I'm proud of this piece and I had a lot of fun creating it so I give myself a pat on the back because I'm very happy with the outcome :))))

Recently I decided that I wanted a ‘space’ somewhere online where I could post/publish my drawings and doodles. I want to try to boost my self-motivation by having an account dedicated to my art. This way I could let others see my work, not only the pieces I deem ‘worthy’ for others to see but instead just show everything. All the crappy sketches, mistakes, and bad sketches along with the digital drawing style that I've been working at or the traditional pen on the paper way. I want to be able to see my progression in skill or style meanwhile not be afraid for criticism.

I also want this platform to help me in the future in regards to a portfolio or at least help promote myself in the future when I have improved my work. I hope that through this account I can make myself known through my effort as well as let people get to know the kind of person I am rather than make assumptions based on a single ‘interview’, conversation or piece of work.

I guess I also just want people to see it, look at it but I'm also hesitant because I'm self-conscious about my lack of skill and exp. I know that people are constantly saying that you shouldn't focus on how many ‘likes’ or ‘followers’ you get but I must admit it doesn’t feel great when no one seems to like the work that you put effort into. I will try my best to avoid having those kinds of negative thoughts but no promises :)

In any case, if you do want to go and check it out then feel free :)

I named it after the three things I was craving at the moment. Chocolate, Latte and a Cappuccino :)

Instagram account : @ chocolatteccino

Finally, it’s summer and I thought that it was about time to go dig out my drawing tablet and finally teach myself how to use it properly. I'm very new to the concept of drawing on a tablet and not looking at what my hands are doing so I often get confused when trying to click on buttons or where it is that I'm drawing.

I was very much deeply inspired by the fact I wanted some cherries at that moment and so drew some to make up for the fact I had none. Hunger is my biggest inspiration :)

I'm actually very proud, for this being my second time to ever use a drawing tablet, of the results of my artwork since I still struggle so much. The process of creating art digitally is much more rewarding I’ve found since it allows space for everything that traditional pen to paper does not. 

I feel that by starting to digitise my artwork in the future, I would be able to overcome things that I couldn't traditionally like erasing mistakes, easily redrawing strokes and applying colour.

I really respect and admire artists when I see their works across social media because I can see the time and effort that has gone into each piece to make them so impressive. I get easily jealous of them since I also want to be on their skill level but I know that it will never happen if I don’t start practising and enjoying my work. I need to allow myself time to slowly improve rather than rush because of my impatience. 

There is no cheat sheet for me and I can't go allowing myself to get sloppy, otherwise, all of this would be for nothing. And wasted effort is something I can't accept!

During my second semester of university, I had to choose an extra course and after looking at the list of possibilities, none really piqued my interest so I chose one based around ‘business’. At the tiime it seemed like a good idea, I mean I thought it could help for the future maybe but when I went to the first class I knew immediately that it was NOT for me so I ditched. yeah I know I probably could have given it a chance but when you know, you know.

I then went to change but obviously, most were full so I decided to push the boat out and make yet another bad decision. I chose Mandarin. But at least this time I ditched it before class even began. 

Now. This was my last and final chance to choose my course otherwise I would not be able to pass the year and ...

I chose to study Japanese. Honestly? I really enjoyed it.

Luckily I had a friend already in the class so I didn't feel as isolated or awkward but she really helped as a support since we were doing it together. It made me want to try my best and I found that I really didn’t struggle as much as I thought it would. I've always been a fan of Japanese culture, It's so dynamic and unique compared to what I know. I've always been a massive fan of the Hayao Miyazaki films, anime and TV drama. From them, I learnt some Japanese by listening and watching it so the classes helped to reinforce that as well as help my knowledge of it grow.

My teacher was really nice and encouraging and I respect her a lot for being able to deal with all my mistakes as well as make each individual class fun and different. I definitely feel that if the classes had been a lot more monotone and boring, then I would not have learnt as well as I did not enjoy my time ad look forward to the next class.

Although it was ‘absolute beginners Japanese’ i found that I was able to focus and work at it in my spare time. At the time I also had a friend who was actually working in japan for an internship and so I was able to share some of the worksheets with her which were useful too.

I would definitely like to learn more and continue studying in my own time because I wat to eventually show signs of influence in my work if possible and maybe create art that has a fusion of my style along with the Japanese culture or language that interests me so much.

Another doodle :)

I’m not sure what but something reminded me of ‘sword in the stone’ and it just stuck in my head so I just picked up a pen and doodled it down. 

It’s scruffy and took some time but it managed to occupy me and my mind so it felt good to just doodle rather than work on projects.

I definitely think I should doodle more and just put my ideas on paper because in the future I could use them for inspiration, act as a daily practice to help me develop my drawing skills and it would also help keep my imagination flowing, through my life and through my work.

Thinking about what I want for the future is so hard since I’ve never really given it much thought because, well, I had too much to worry about now.

For the future :

> I will get in touch with design agencies for potential placement, work, or portfolio review. > I will see how I can advance to the next level in my work and take on more self-motivated projects outside of class. > I will focus on practising my skills and improve skills using the Adobe creative suite. > I will take all the opportunities when they arise. > I will plan my weeks ahead of time otherwise it'll go by too quickly and ill be left behind... again. > I will practice my digital skills by following tutorials online and copying the work of others - to eventually create my own style. > I will read more articles about what is going on in the world - design articles/magazines/trends/ etc. 

I want real experiences in working with a company. I feel like I'm not ready but if i keep thinking like that then I'll never be ready. Now is a better time than any.

a letter from my future self

I don’t know what you're trying to do, but keep doing it. Don’t lose hope in the face of something difficult. Keep pushing yourself because no one else is going to do it for you. Stop worrying about what others are gonna say because half the time they haven’t even noticed you. The world doesn't revolve around what other people think of you but more of what you think of yourself.

Yeah, it’s okay to admit and accept that your work is kinda crappy, maybe even half-assed at times and your skill in most areas if below average. But at least you know where to go from there, you have plenty of room to get yourself in shape, practice, put the effort in so you get rewarded what you deserve.

It’s never too late to start managing your time wisely and create a routine. Once you start it’ll get easier. Develop your skills and create your own style so that your work is unique to you and you recognise that.

It’s okay to be stressed, worried and want to quit but it’s the fact that you haven’t yet that can push you forward. Stop crying and complaining when you know your just avoiding the inevitable. Get on with it rather than procrastinating and feeling guilty later. pretending it’s not there and you can’t see it doesn't mean it doesn’t exist.

Go, right now, make some coffee. Sit in bed, get your laptop out and watch a movie. Relax and clear your mind - maybe even put a facemask on - and give yourself some time to gather your thoughts. Then and only then can you work hard, knowing I’ve got your back.

P.s We have run out of your favourite snacks, so if you could stock up that would be great, you'll thank me later :)