AS IF FROM A RABID DOG

sam's freaking out. he thinks dean's absolutely lost it and he's treating him so warily like he could attack at any moment

he smokes!!!!!!!!!!! this is SOOOOO important to me. he stops. so he can light a marlboro. he takes a heavy, trembling drag. HE TAKES A HEAVY, TREMBLING DRAG. i'm.

kripke really said, dean's a smoker. amen.

AND he's an alcoholic right off the bat. amen x2

dean offers to drive sam home from college and he's like. "let's smoke." beautiful. this is my dean

"definitely un-p.c." i can definitely see how this man banned umbrellas

kripke is going OFF, "you can take your anemic alternative pop and shove it up your ass" i need to read more kripke scripts after this i am having the time of my life

KRIPKE BANS SEATBELT IN HIS P.C. CAR. NO SEATBELTS. NO UMBRELLAS. JENSEN WENT FROM A MAN WHO BANNED STRAWS TOA MAN WHO BANNED SEATBELTS. anyway

sam refuses obviously. but like. go dean!

the fact that sam suspects that dean is going to "score some drugs" makes me so enamored of dean. this is probably something i should work on in therapy

sam being afraid of dean is like. dean i love u. i know i showed this picture earlier in the post but it's just sooooooo good.

i know that in this script supernatural things are real. i know that. but let's take a moment to live in a world where dean is off his rocker. it's nice, right?

so btw there's an aunt cheryl character. and i just love this. "i think he's sick". yes he is unbalanced yes he believes in ghosts and spooks and maybe. just maybe. he killed dad.

this is just delicious.

sam is afraid of dean. sam thinks dean killed john. sam thinks. dean killed. john. i literally need this. i need a fic where dean did kill john. i need that soooo badly and i will write it after i get some sleep. u guys i am going to write this

dean is unhinged!!!!!! (yes i know in the script he's not actually unhinged and he's right but that's so much less hot)

I DON'T KNOW

they're gonna get you the best help in the world........ you can't make me go, sam........... this dynamic. sam's fear versus dean being genuinely absolutely batshit bananas balls to the wall insane. also yes i know that there are problematic elements to what i'm saying. i am stigmatizing mental illness. but listen. i have such mental illness i think it's okay

i know this is the same as the pilot that aired but like. sometimes supernatural is good actually. you can never go home

like...

and for all i know YOU MURDERED THE MAN. amazing. show stopping. spectacular. chills.

i love this version of john. who's actually called jack i think

anyway and then sam learns that ghosts are real and we lose this really amazing jack harrison and dean harrison personality disorder situation (i can say this bc i have a personality disorder)

I've had a Wincest fic idea for years that I've been waiting for someone else to write. I think I've read exactly one fic that came close.

To me, in canon (outside of pre-canon possibilities), there's one time where Wincest was almost destined to happen. I mean, I feel the writers probably had to grab a hold of the steering wheel and force it straight (no pun intended) to make sure they didn't get anywhere near Wincest with their storytelling.

Demon Dean.

You can't tell me that Demon Dean wouldn't want his brother by his side just as much as human Dean did. The exception being that Demon Dean would do whatever was necessary to make it happen, including polluting his beatific baby brother. (What I mean is that Human Dean always thought of Sam as being better than him, smarter, more innocent, and basically more worthy of every good thing life could give. No matter what he says when he's mad, Dean believes that Sam is perfect, and Dean is the one who's wrong and bad. I could go on about this, but I won't.)

So, Dean wakes up with black eyes and leaves Sam? To go with Crowley? Nuh uh. No way. Crowley's gonna die, like, right away. Dean might say, "Thanks for talking me through that whole coming back thing, but I think I've got it from here," before stabbing Crowley in the gut with the First Blade. No, when Dean wakes up and is no longer burdened with guilt or pain? He's gonna want Sam to feel this good, too. But he knows that Sam's gonna think it's all wrong and bad and evil and shit and fight him on it. Dean's gonna give Sam this gift of freedom, but he's gonna have to be sneaky about it.

Dean's going to find Sam passed out in a chair in the library after drinking most of a fifth of hunter's helper. He's gonna sneak up on his sleeping angel of a brother and do what he knows worked in the past.

He's gonna open up a vein and let it drip into Sammy's mouth.

And when Sam startles awake, mostly drunk, still half asleep, eyes nearly glued shut from dried tears, he's gonna have the forbidden, rich taste of demon blood on his tongue covering the sour aftertaste of whiskey and grief. There's already gonna be power starting to flow through his veins. There's gonna be a moment of fear, of making the same mistakes all over again, of having to dry out in the dungeon instead of Bobby's panic room, of having to hear his inner demons sounding like Dean telling him he's a freak and a monster.

But then he's gonna see his big brother, alive and grinning at him like the first time Sam hit the center of the dart board in that backwoods dive bar when Sam was 8 and Dean was 12 and John was off hustling pool for cash. Dean's alive, standing above him, smiling at him, and Sam can't not be happy. Relieved. Even though he figures out pretty quickly that it's Dean's blood in his mouth. Even though he understands what Dean is, now. Even though he knows what Dean wants, now.

Sam has felt what it's like to be without Dean more times than he cares to remember. This is a battle he just doesn't have the will to fight.

So, licking his lips, he takes Dean's arm and puts the stream of blood coming from the cut to his mouth and he drinks. When the cut closes, he cleans off Dean's skin with his tongue until there's not even a shade of red left, all the while, looking into Dean's eyes.

When black eyes meet black eyes, Sam stands and pushes Dean against the table, boxing him in with his height. When Dean doesn't flinch, Sam slams his lips onto his brother's, moaning enthusiastically when Dean opens up for him with no hesitation. The faint taste of blood passes between them until Sam nips Dean's lip too hard and more blood floods into their mouths.

I dream about Dad all the time.  It’s usually the same one, too.  We’re all in the car.  I’m sitting in the driver’s seat, dad’s sitting shotgun.  But there aren’t any shotguns.  There’s no monsters.  There’s no hunting.  There’s none of that.  It’s just … He’s teaching me how to drive.  And, uh, and I’m not little like I was when he actually taught me how to drive.  I’m 16, and he’s helping me get my learner’s permit.  Of course, you’re in the backseat, just begging to take a turn.  We pull up to the house – the family house – and I park in the driveway, and he looks over and he says, “perfect landing, son.”  I have that dream every couple of months.  Kind of comforting, actually. 

“I’ll let you do anything you want to me. Anything. Upside of having no soul.” He drank, smiled. “No inhibitions.” (Supernatural: Coyote’s Kiss by Christa Faust)