Reyna is gay

It baffles and infuriates me that Hogwarts students don’t take Latin or Greek. Accio? Literally “I summon.” Lumos? Fucking “light.” Expelliarmus? Expel weapon!! Ooooh I wonder what Levicorpus does– you Dumb Ass Bastard. You ILLITERATE. It’s called Levicorpus, it lifts someone’s body, it LEVIES your goddamn CORPUS-

Hermione ghost wrote this

When you broke but you woke

This, a thousand fucking times this. Privilege is spouting and spreading pseudo-science bullshit you saw on your Facebook feed or on Twitter because unlike people in drought and famine prone areas of the world, you have the option to do just that. Those other parts of the world that don’t have the benefit of a food surplus and can’t pick and choose what they eat depend on GMOs to not die of starvation or watch their children waste away. I despise Monsanto as much as the next person and if they ever go out of business, I’ll be the first to dance a jig, but condemning GMOs just because one megacorp is a pile of shitbags is beyond idiotic. If scientists can create new strains of seeds that can withstand disease, pests, all while yielding more foodstuff, then we should be throwing our support behind them.

GMO scaremongering is second only to vaccine scaremongering

I always laugh when people say “there are chemicals in my food!” because buddy…. you are chemicals. People are literally made of organic compounds, which are… chemical compounds with carbon in ‘em. YOU ARE THE CHEMICALS

Chemicals in my me?

I love how Ray Holt is portrayed simultaneously as a serious, emotionless captain as well as the most dramatic and petty person on the whole team. I live for his deadpan dramatic-ness and I’ve honestly never seen a character like him before on TV

“it would be impossible for this disabled character to be played by a disabled actor because of the things this character can do in this movie” well then maybe…… you fucked up in the writing of this disabled character……

The Spy Kids films had disabled actor Ricardo Montalbán play the kids’ disabled grandpa, and in the third movie he was CGI’d into an Iron-Man style bodysuit that made him look like he was able to walk and take part in a high-speed futuristic car race and other action sequences. And this was in 2003. If a goofy kids’ franchise can do it using embarassingly bad early 2000s CGI, you have literally no excuse.

If your straight guy friend says that he supports gays, tell him that you thought he was gay when you first met him. See how fast he gets upset and insecure & starts asking you why you thought that.

My gay guy friend tried this to our straight friend and the response he got was “thought? More like hoped” and then he winked. That’s a real ally right there. 

He really just scalped your poor gay friend on the spot didn’t he lmfao

I tried this on a straight friend and he turned bright red and mumbled something about how he might be bisexual actually? so I introduced him to some of the other queer folks I know and flash forward 4 months he’s definitely bi and out to all of our friends and dating a guy on his intramural kickball team.

this has the aura of being funny but i genuinely have no idea what the fuck any of them are saying

bööls of wa’ah

this is what Scottish Twitter is supposed to sound like

Why does he speak like a 180 year old mad wizard

no offence but let yourself be ugly!! you don’t have to fix your hair if you’re not going anywhere you don’t have to cover up ur spots or change out of your lounge pants to go buy milk like damn we really gotta let ourselves be comfortable without constantly apologising for just looking normal and it’s hard but i think we need to practice looking in the mirror and saying i look ugly af today and that’s okay!! tru self care is letting urself be ugly tbh

secondhand embarrassment is pure agony and i wish a lot of comedy didnt rely on it

I cannot deal with it. I have to literally leave the room.

It’s a sign of being extremely empathetic.

thanks! i hate it, how do i uninstall?

id pay twenty dollars to find out what arion the potty mouthed horse actually said @rrriordan its a serious buisness proposal and a worthy investment

I got five bucks and a chocolate bar will that do? @demigodgooglesearches @rrriordan

RICK WE GOT $45 AND A CHOCOLATE BAR COME ON MAN @rrriordan

I’ll throw in a 30, because why not

$95 GUYS

$5!!!!!

Donate to the cause, we want the dirty mouth secrets Rick is keeping from us

Over six hundred dollars already just to know what a horse said

we need to know

One thing I’ve learned in life, if you act really self-assured and confident you can pretty much get away with anything.

For example, I’ve watched someone walk on to a plane with no passport. Just walked right on.

Once walked out of a dude’s house with a pair of his pants slung over my shoulder. Did all the usual eye-contact, saying-goodbye movements and noises, just… while stealing his pants. He did not notice. 

I told my English teacher that she graded my final paper(I did not turn one in) and that she told me it was well written. She scrambled 3 days trying to find the nonexistent paper, then apologized to me for losing it and gave me a 96%. Confidence is key

my dad’s mate just walked out of a shop with a canoe and didn’t get questioned

Humans are like bees: if they sense you’re an intruder all hell will break loose, but if you get inside the hive they just assume you belong there. Be confident.

Bee confident

This is funny but also true, and a huge tip when traveling. Act like you belong, and you won’t be bothered like other tourists might. Especially on public transportation… do your research ahead of time and look like a disinterested commuter and you’ll blend right in.

Fun Fact about Bees: they use pheromones to communicate and the pheromone to signal ALARM is the same chemical that makes bananas smell like bananas so if you eat a banana and then breathe on a beehive you will regret it and this seemed relevant when i started writing it

oh wow gen z isnt using a site thats mostly used by 40 year old moms sharing minion memes

Godspeed, young ones. Succeed where we failed. Destroy the beast.