we didn't even wrap presents

It's actually super unethical to keep a peeve as a pet

Everybody in the club Yield to my will

castration emoji now please

They say ooooh be a good boy for daddy and you'll get a reward. But then the reward is just gay sex. This is bullshit. I wanted a skateboard

humiliating to be attracted to a conventionally attractive person. I thought I was a more sensitive and refined pervert than this

I fucking love my bitter pill! Not even hard to swallow!

(snaps out of it) OH MY GOD WHAT HAVE I BEEN DOING!! HOLY JESUS CHRIST FUCK WHY DID NOBODY TRY TO STOP ME (eases back into it) ahhhh. yeah this feels right

She said do you love me I tell her only partly I only love my Stills and my Nash and my Crosby

Peeling the lid off of a yogurt and it's a big spiral staircase going down forever

Unfortunately it’s very easy to lure me places because I like to go somewhere

Dahling you simply must read this book! It’s all about this devious little caterpillar who simply gorges himself on all manner of divine things