MOVED to a new blog!

Just a reminder to my late-night followers - this blog has moved.

This blog has moved! Please follow my new blog instead! It’s the same stuff, but with a primary tumblr account so I can do more things (like reply to asks!).  

Please follow my new account and send all asks and messages there instead of here.  THANK YOU!!

http://learningpoly.tumblr.com

http://learningpoly.tumblr.com

http://learningpoly.tumblr.com

This blog has moved!  Please follow my new blog instead! It's the same stuff, but with a primary tumblr account so I can do more things (like reply to asks!)

http://learningpoly.tumblr.com/

http://learningpoly.tumblr.com/

This blog has moved!

Please come follow me here instead! 

---->    learningpoly.tumblr.com  <----

This is a secondary blog. I didn’t know it at the time, but secondary blogs can’t follow anyone, or respond to messages in private, or even like posts.   :/

This is starting to feel really restrictive, as I can’t follow anyone back from here (and I’m not "out" as polyamorous on my primary blog, so I can’t follow/reblog poly blogs from there either), and a few people have sent me messages where I’m not sure if it would be appropriate to reply in public. I can't even like posts to show support for others!   :(

Is there any way to fix this? Or is the only solution starting a new primary blog from scratch, with 0 posts, 0 followers, and 0 reblogs? Heck, I’d pay for the option to convert to a primary blog if it were available (hey Tumblr staff, listen up!)

I really don’t want to lose you guys, or the wonderful comments and messages you’ve sent me, or added in a reblog! Starting over means I lose all that, right? :(

Polyamory is a term steeped in feminist tradition that focuses on sex-positive attitudes toward love and relationships with more than one partner.

With Illinois poised to become the 15th US state to allow same-sex marriage, I think this is a great idea. In Canada, where same-sex marriage has been legal since 2005, the progress of same-sex rights in the US still seems painfully slow and awkward to me, but I am pleased at the progress.  I also think that it’s definitely time for polyamory to start to be more public  and to follow suit.

I do think one of the biggest hurdles facing the polyamory movement (are we a movement?) is the public’s perceived connection to polygamy, and the main reason that’s a bad thing is because it is indeed “associated with extreme wings of certain religious perspectives and often conjures images of child brides and rampant sexual abuse or inequality” in the public consciousness. That’s what I’ve run into, even coming out about my relationship to my liberal-minded friends.  It’s somewhat that was outside their frame of reference, and so their minds naturally leaped to the closest thing they had heard of: polygamy, and all of the emotional and social baggage that comes with it. They were open-minded enough not to dismiss it outright, but they were definitely concerned about me (“Are you sure you’re okay?" "Are you being coerced into it?" "Is his wife being forced into it?”). They got it, eventually, but that was still the first thought they had.

Wow! Over 200 people care about what I have to say about polyamory? Thank you all so much!

I want to share both the high and lows of navigating a polyamorous relationship for the first time, instead of just one or the other, to help poly newbies (and not-so-newbies) know that they are not alone in their joys or struggles.  I write my thoughts and experiences for everyone, but especially for those who may be lost and confused about dealing with an "alternative" relationship for the first time.

I don’t always trust this.  I should, though.  I've survived everything so far, so all past evidence indicates I'll survive through more and still be fine.