hey so my old blog got suspended without warning and no apparent reason so this is my backup account for now, hoping I will get my original account back :')

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@lazybiiird
hey so my old blog got suspended without warning and no apparent reason so this is my backup account for now, hoping I will get my original account back :')

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i think more ppl would understand ivan and the way his brain works if they recognized that a major theme of nowhere is the way life has beaten him down from a very young age to the point where he views the very act of dreaming and hoping for things as something futile that only invites avoidable pain and disappointment.
he's been made very aware of what a shit hand he's been dealt and no matter what he does nothing ever seems to work out for him and so it became easier to just resign himself to the idea that it's an unchangeable aspect of his existence as a defense mechanism
this mindset is also such an important part of his relationship with till because ivan tries to temper his feeling toward him by enforcing the same pessimistic mindset that avoids grasping for things he believes are fundamentally out of his reach and convincing himself he doesn't expect anything from till while not actually being able to keep himself from desiring and wanting things from him.
"i'm not expecting anything, but i do wish" is the constant conflict for ivan when it comes to till bc he tries to logic away his desire as a protective measure while not really managing to dampen it as much as he convinces himself he has. it's the whole "i expected as much" aspect of till turning around during escape attempt while also feeling anger and resentment for it because, despite it all, ivan wouldn't have tried if he didn't truly believe in the chance that till really would come with him and part of him does feel wronged for being given that hope and having it blow up in his face
in retrospect it is SO obvious that till was always projecting ivan onto mizi but i just wanna point out some of the discrepancies USING ONLY MV SCREENSHOTS.
in round 2 we get this sequence when he sings "my feelings are Error: no better options" which, i don't think you say that about someone you have a hopeless crush on. what do you mean "no better options," that sounds like you're settling or something. also error??? so you were focused on the wrong person, till??? hmm i wonder what this could be about...
and this one is when he sings "(you'll never know) i don't wanna stop" which... idk! maybe that ivan was never able to know how much he meant to till in his lifetime
anyways this is him fantasizing about mizi, right?? or at least it seems that way. however if you actually look closer, there are some… rather obvious issues…
EXHIBIT A:
her hair is wrong. mizi doesn’t have bangs like that. her bangs are more off to the side and not as straight cut across her forehead. also she just has more hair in general?? screenshots from r1
you know who DOES have bangs cut straight across his forehead? ivan. (r3 but also literally every single art of him)
EXHIBIT B:
this one is subtler, and also what got me thinking about this in the first place, but her eyelashes are also wrong. mizi doesn't have thick lashes like that.
r1 vs r2
as you can see, till draws mizi/visualizes mizi with really thick lashes, and all in a clump. in reality, though, her lashes are thinner, and spikier towards the edges. especially her bottom eyelashes.
do i even need to say who has eyelashes like that? it's one of his distinguishing features! (screenshot from wiege)
EXHIBIT C:
i feel like i'm beating a dead horse at this point, but anyways. the hands behind the back pose. mizi does not do that. IVAN DOES THAT. (more screenshots from wiege)
also, like, her general pose and body language in the “pass” frame are so so SO reminiscient of ivan. like if you remove the ponytail and glasses that is basically just ivan but with pink hair. till you are NOT subtle at all buddy…
anyways! i think most people are aware by now that till was projecting onto mizi, but maybe never noticed how far back the clues were. they were right there from the start. it's just that we got a little blinded from the story telling us that till has a crush on mizi. (or at least i did lol). alnst is one of those media where you notice new things every time you rewatch and it's really nice to pick up on them
Do you guys like my Ivan Alien Stage analysis
Ivantill's karma
Design + base colors by me / Rendering by @naruysae

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The Witch looking for love
Design + base colors by me / Rendering by @naruysae
Does anyone know how long the support team can take to get back to you? It's been over a day and I'm just scared I'll never get my blog back 😭
Happy Friendship Day, @exploding-noises!!! Here's my gift for you, a Mizisua oneshot, hope you like it! :D
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
thank you @alnstgiftexchange for hosting, I was super happy to take part in this exchange <3
chapter 6 of my jockemo fic is out:
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Rating: T
Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Pairing: Ivan/Till
Additional Tags: Jock Ivan/ Emo Till, Alternate Universe: College/University
Status: 6/? chapters (ongoing)
Summary:
“You need to help me get over him,” Till shook his head, “erase those feelings, whatever.” Mizi and Sua exchanged a look only they understood —call it the power of love. “I don't think that's what you need, Till,” Sua stated matter-of-factly. “Then what?” “You need to flirt with Ivan, test the waters and see if he feels the same about you!” Mizi clapped as if to emphasize the genius idea she'd just had. “Flirt?” Till choked out. He was already in unknown territory. He’d seen what flirting looked like in rom-coms or whatever, but there was no fucking way it could be applied to real-life practice.
Or: Till catches feelings for Ivan, and Mizi and Sua are on a mission to teach him the art of flirting.
really i've been very busy!

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Jealousy
post-show auction
nooot upset about the pencil thing anymore. needless to say
Contacted some (most) of my mutuals (I cannot contact everyone) so I think we're good in that regard, it just sucks (a lot) to have had my account terminated🫠 hopefully this one stays a backup account and not my new permanent account
ivantill cuddling :)

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uwaaaaaa
source: @/Official_ALNST on X
Ok, these might be my new fave official art, like the stylization is so ajdbnsjenieinfiroenindis