#ivantill

Ivan is a solitary soul. His compass points to Till but Till doesn't look back. His soul longs to give itself completely yet he cannot bring Till to actually look at him for once.

Ivan knows Till's infatuation with Mizi is not mutualised. Mizi loves Sua. Sua doesn't like Ivan. Ivan doesn't prefer her either. After all, who likes to see a mirror held up to them reflecting their worst?

Now, two questions remain. Is Till anything other than straight? And if yes, will Ivan be the recipient of his affections?

If Mizi were not a friend, Ivan would've considered taking her out of the picture in his own way. As Mizi and Sua are a pair, he would've sent them along together. Perhaps cause a fight between Sua and Till so Sua takes Mizi away?

Alas, Mizi doesn't deserve that and Ivan has no patience to deal with Sua. As for Till, Ivan will never intentionally hurt him busy as is par for the course with the existence of a parasite, he already has.

Ivan hurts him everyday by choosing to cling to him desperately and never letting go, even if for an instant.

A note falls onto his desk in the classroom he had flown away from in his reverie. The note is from his Till. Till wants to meet after college in the cafe they frequent for lunch.

A hope starts to flutter in Ivan's heart that he himself crushes. It is impossible. Till is most certainly not giving any signals. Probably just wants to spend time with Ivan. They are supposed to be friends, after all. Nothing more and most definitely less than Ivan's fanciful delusion.

Ivan sees a sketch of him lost in his dream on the back of the note. Till rendered him beautiful. A beauty that Ivan has yet to see. A beauty that is fragile and fleeting, as if the artist's muse will look away the very second the artist starts sketching, leaving the composition useless.

This doesn't make much sense to Ivan. Yes, Till is sensitive in his creativity but since when has he focused on Ivan as such? Since when has he seen Ivan this way?

Ivan sends the note away with his written assent nestled beneath the sketch, almost wanting to cradle Till's signature right beside.

Ivan sneaks a glance over when Till receives the note to see such a sweet and unburdened smile that Ivan's heart leaps to skip a couple beats.