It should come as no surprise for followers of this blog that Luigi has been in the news lately. Specifically, a very particular part of him.
And I really mean, in all of the news.
When I started this blog, I never thought I’d be superseded by actual mainstream news. I also never intended to get this graphic, but since this is now covered by international media, I guess it’s time.
So people are going crazy over this render from Mario Tennis Aces where Luigi has a very visible bulge in his shorts. I’m not going to dwell to much on this, because it’s been covered extensively elsewhere, but I think it’s interesting to look at why this is becoming a news story this time specifically.
See, as I’ve covered in my previous posts, the Mario brothers have a very particular design trait in almost all of their renders and in-game character models. Both of them don’t really have a mid-section like a human being, with hips and a waist. Instead, their bellies mostly just attach to the tops of the legs, in a very cartoonish fashion.
Personally, I’ve always liked the more “realistic” versions, where they seem to have something more closely resembling a real mid-section. However, in more recent character art, Nintendo and their collaborators have moved away towards a more Mickey Mouse:ified version, with rounder bellies, more exaggerated features and less human proportions.
This is why the Mario Tennis Aces renders are such an unexpected surprise. This is the first time in official art that Luigi and Mario are depicted with real, actual, human waists. This is also the reason why they now actually have somewhat realistic groins. If you look at the Mario images, he’s also packing package, even if the renders don’t emphasise it quite as much as for his brother.
Now, compare this to the other, more recent renders from games like Super Mario Odyssey and Mario & Rabbids:
Because I’m a serious Mario scientist, let’s zoom and enhance on the most important aspects of these images. Since he’s the one whose anatomy started this uproar, let’s begin with out boy Luigi.
In Super Mario Odyssey his crotch looks like this:
This is very much in line with his normal character design. The lower part of the belly is rounded and comes to a smooth, curved line that stops exactly between where his legs meet. If you look at the Mario render above, you’ll see the same thing.
What this implies is that their stomachs just sort of sit between their legs, and is where their lower bodies connect to their upper halves. If you were to mentally undress Luigi in this shot, where do you imagine his penis would be? Because what seems to be his zipper starts at the widest point of his belly.
Compare this to the now infamous Aces shot:
Yeah, that is definitely different. If you can tear your eyes away from the goods for a second, take a look at his belly this time. Notice there there is no curved line that stops in his middle and vanishes. Instead, his belly is much less pronounced this time. This is actually probably the slimmest he’s ever been.
The little tease of his belly poking out under his shirt is telling. It’s completely flat against his shorts, indicating that he does not have a paunch at all. Again, compare that with the Odyssey render above, where he has his characteristic rounded tummy on full display.
This is the key for why his dick has caused such a stir. It’s the first time that the Mario’s have been depicted with a groin, hip area or waist that could reasonably contain one. In fact, this was even more visible in the first screenshot of Luigi in the same game, but that apparently didn’t warrant international media attention. Although, I personally think it should have:
This shot makes the belly line even slimmer, indicating that Luigi’s lost a ton of weight for this game. Mario’s shots also feature a pretty noticeable bulge, but he’s a little fatter than his brother, even if not quite as much as normal:
And just to be fair and balance, let’s look closer at Mr M’s big D:
The interesting thing to speculate about now is what this means for the future of the franchise. Is this a permanent change in their anatomy, and how purposeful was the change to begin with?
As for the second part, I think it must have been a purposeful change. Maybe not by the grander Nintendo corporation, but I don’t believe that the way Luigi’s pride and joy is presented is a coincidence. Just look at the way his shirt rides up just above the crotch, as if this make sure you see it.
Whoever rendered this shot definitely knew what they were doing. Maybe they underestimated how much fuzz would be generated from it, but I refuse to believe it’s an accident.
Clothes don’t generally do that in the Mario universe. They don’t flow and bend realistically to match a character’s action, even in renders where there is tons of movement. This is the single time it happens, and it’s literally inches away from Luigi’s 3.7 inches.
The Mario sports spinoffs have had a history of slightly altering the character designs, so I doubt this is a change that’ll stay in the main series. However, I would absolutely love it to. As much as I love the cartoonier designs, this is a really cool, subtle change that I think is a nice step in an unexpected and delightful direction.
I can’t wait to see Luigi’s character design in the game in motion, and if there are more renders to come.
I suppose the big thing to take away from this hubbub is that people really love Mario and Luigi’s dicks. I can’t say I blame them.
