kaputzz

(backseating you at the mortar and pestle) man you aint even squarshing it

oh well i guess ill just be fat and hot

kiss this babey

"Let's get cherished by mamas"

the real answer to almost every "does [identity A] belong in [identity B] spaces" question is actually just "these spaces are informal social groups and if you're cool you can hang, don't worry about it"

not without those fire exits I'm not. have fun in your death trap, ladies

sometimes older people get annoyed when i say "no problem" instead of "you're welcome" but the truth is it's literally not a problem

and sometimes you're not welcome

you have to be in a certain specific mood to listen to classic rock because sometimes a guy is playing his guitar and you're just like shut the fuck up man

Computer loves to be like "fuck! You sure you want to shut down? Youve got volume mixer open"

*right clicks on you*

*views your properties*

i once again want to say that hulu used to be entirely free with ads, and if you watched two minutes worth of commercials at the start of an episode the next 24 hours would be commercial-free. and now you pay $11.99 per month to watch things with commercials. what the fuck are we doing and how did we allow this to happen lol.

I think it would be so funny if there was a show about King Arthur and the knight of the Round Table where a different knight(s) joins the Round Table every episode and it gets to the point where the cast is like 500 people and absolutely no one is acknowledging that there are like 400 people in this court. Like a gratuitous amount of knights. The plot randomly pivots to knight or knights of the week and then back but it’s not an anthology exactly. Some of them die the same day they join, some randomly disappear from the story and others are technically there for the rest of the series but doing fuckall. Occasionally Arthur will be like “Where has Sir Whatever gone?” and everyone will shrug. Very important quest surrounding the major knights you’re expecting and a minor knight no one has seen for 5 seasons randomly joins in. You need a knightly spreadsheet to join in.

This is all handled very dryly by all the other characters, except for Arthur who occasionally breaks the 3rd wall, addresses the camera and says something like “This is all very confusing.” when the plot hits maximum ridiculousness.

"that time of the month" "monthly visitor" "feminine hygiene products" GRRAH!!! SHUT UP SHUT UP!!! PERIOD!! MENSTRUATION!!!! TAMPONS!!! PADS!! MENOPAUSE!!!!!!!!!!!

VAGINA!!!!