Avocados Give Me Life

I love being an adult who always puts my hand out to shake when I meet a kid! every single time their face is like "no one does The Adult Greeting Ritual with me, is this a sign of respect or is this man simply unhinged" and then of course as we talk they realise it's both

you're just mad because you're hungry and tired and your legs hurt and you head hurts and you're too hot and you have depression

"it's all in your head" correct! unfortunately I am also in there

BABY DOES NOT NEED SMOKO

Pirate’s booty, Pirate’s penis, Pirate’s balls. All treasure.

What about a Pirate's soul?

Does not matter at all to me. Pirates are made to be objectified.

At the sex shop asking if I can buy a regular sized dildo I can put in my unremarkable asshole but they recognize me as the hero of legend regardless

"why was the ending so rushed it was so good up until the ending" the answer is the same every time no matter the media you're talking about: the author is a bee and had to go back to the hive to defend the queen

I, a hearing person who likes subtitles just as a preference, shouldn't have to read a subtitle that's obvious nonsense, go back a couple seconds, and listen again in order to figure out what's going on. An accessibility feature should not be the most half-assed part of a professionally made production. Scripted media has absolutely no excuse for not having subtitles or having subtitles that aren't perfectly verbatim. Professional captioning services should be ashamed of the shoddy work that they put out. Captions should be treated as a part of the production, just like filming, editing, audio balancing, etc - and anything that releases with missing or bad captions should be seen as unfinished

i bet girls hated it in 1902 cuz you would constantly go on dates w guys who are working on an invention to present at the world fair