The Konfused Kingdom @kweenofkonfusion - Tumblr Blog

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Hi, I'm Kweeny, Tumblr's resident Disaster Queer™ in the throes of Internet Brainrot

|| If you know me irl, No You Don't || To my wonderful followers, U Da Best <3 || To my mutuals, I luv you (っ˘з˘)っ ♡ ||

The tag for my posts and posts I've replied to is #Kweeny Speaks, and the one for posts I've rambled in the tags of is #Kweeny rants in the tags

Now, you wanna know my stances? My opinions on certain things? Look below the Keep reading to find out

#kweeny speaks #pinned post #I don't have a DNI cause I don't believe in them #and I block liberally cause I expect others to do the same if my stuff bothers them #moving on tho #I spent waaaay too long customizing my carrd cause I got carried away with the customization options #being able to custom colorcode the buttons was too tempting to resist #it's so nice to have the links to all my stuff in one place tho #very organized. i enjoy it #btw there is no personal info on my carrd besides my age and pronouns #which I have on my blog(s) anyway #if you wanna find my like. Ao3 and sideblogs that's on there too

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angel-derangement

“we live in an uncaring universe” yeah dude and I live in an uncaring house. and I shit in an uncaring toilet. but do you touch an uncaring lover? do you comfort an uncaring child? do you guide to sleep each night a cold and uncaring self?

angel-derangement

please hurry up in reblogging this I wanna jorts it before someone puts it in one of those heartwarming tiktok slideshows

ablubluh

i was like 'what could jorts it possibly mean' but as with many things clicking the original post immediately clarified the situation

homunculus-argument

The Odyssey but retold as a low-stakes modern adventure of one guy out with his girlfriend leaving the bar with his buddies to do just one (1) simple thing real quick, it'll take like 15 minutes tops, he'll be right back, but then some bullshit happens and the trip keeps getting more complicated as more bullshit keeps happening while he just tries to get back to the bar because he promised his girlfriend that he'd get back and he knows that she's still there because she told him she'd wait there.

And by the time he finally gets back it's almost 3 am and the bar is about to close while she's sitting there stone cold sober, surrounded by 5 drunk guys unsuccessfully trying to convince her to give up on waiting for him and go home with one of them instead. And the guy shows up to proceed to beat the shit out of them before explaining himself to her like hey sorry bullshit kept happening, my phone fell into a storm drain and my wallet got stolen when I was trying to find someone who'd borrow me a phone so I could call and

thekijs

His girlfriend had been fending off the 5 drunk guys for most of the evening by explaining that even if she was going to ditch her boyfriend, she can't possibly leave without finishing her beer, which she is keeping perpetually full via careful sleight of hand where she's just pouring it back and forth into and out of the pitcher.

However the drunk guys are also drinking, and eventually she can't afford to buy another pitcher for the table so she can't keep up the ever-full beer glass trick. At this point she has to resort to setting up the pool trick shot that she's never seen anyone but her boyfriend pull off, and says she'll leave with whoever manages the shot first.

That buys her another hour or so and then, finally, her boyfriend makes it back. He looks like shit, hair down and just a mess, he's wearing an entirely different jacket that he got from an alley, and barely recognizable—especially to 5 guys who've been drunk for hours now. He lurks for a minute, finds out what's going on, and proceeds to pull off the trick shot first try. Throws the jacket off, fixes his hair with a hair tie his girlfriend lends him, finally looks like himself again, and THEN beats the shit out of them with the pool cue.

weaselle

yuh i was there, that's how it happened

slimetony

in 2017 we’re replacing our cerebrospinal fluid with sierra mist

c3po

no idea what this means

slimetony

lemon lime spine

persephoneme

i hateeee the framing of any type of media engagement that relies on juxtaposing fun, enjoyable, 'low' art (usually [m/m] fanfiction, romance novels, genre fiction, &c.) with difficult, fufilling 'high' art (usually classics, arthouse films, &c) as like. 'fast food vs. vegetables', 'entertainment' vs 'personal (moral?) development' not the least because these aren't remotely discrete categories but also because its annoyingggg

persephoneme

people used to love to do this in fandom with femslash specifically and i hated it then also. do you have any idea how demeaning it is to have to hear people framing the act of reading stories about people like you as eating vegetables. as atonement for the sin of wanting to read about men fucking. come on now

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persephoneme

you can't say "hey has anyone noticed that M/M fic outnumbers F/F like 100:1” or “it feels racist that only 3/202 characters on the ao3 top 100 ships list are Black and two of them are Alastor HazbinHotel” bc some ppl will start going like “oh so you think we should FORCE people to write about things they DON’T CARE ABOUT for WOKE????” and you’ll be like “no, i’m pointing out that the conditions that created this disparity are informed by racism & misogyny” and ppl will say “it’s not BIGOTED to only care about WHITE MEN” and then the gargoyle king appears

jomjjeoro

hey guys. this is my invention. check it out

worldheritagepostorganization

World Heritage Post

ex0skeletal-undead

Giant Skeletons by Jocelin Carmes

This artist on Instagram

lesbianshepard

waaaay back when I was a cashier in retail we would talk about dumb shit while unloading the truck, and we got to the "what would you do in a zombie apocalypse" me and another worker were like yeah we would just die. End it all, we can't fight or run or shit. I refuse to put that much effort into survival.

And my manager was like no!!!! If that happened, I would drive to find you guys in my truck and we could eat stuff from my wife's garden and I would make sure everyone I know survived!! I would carry you all on my shoulders away from the zombies!!

Anyway, random shout out to that guy. You were too kind for retail management, Devin.

lesbianshepard

also afterwards everyone who was talking about their cool bunker fantasies were like "Damn, Devin's right, we should also be considering helping people around us." which is the only recorded instance of a retail shift making people better human beings.

segamascott

#yay I got a gold star!

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felixcloud6288

*Arriving at the sex dungeon in full plate armor and wielding a broadsword*

... I'm asexual and can't think of anything funny to follow up with.

felixcloud6288

#are you perhaps there to defeat the bad dragon?#:3

I dunno. I was invited to a dungeon and came prepared to do some level grinding.

rneliflua

I hate the way the word girlboss gets thrown around to describe every pop culture female character who is resourceful and has aspirations outside of marrying some guy and popping his babies even by people who call themselves progressive

rneliflua

sure, pop culture media who thinks that writing a woman behaving as a stereotypical badass is a substitute for interiority is a thing, but the issue is the lack of interiority, not the fact that she is good at things and doesn't take shit

aroace-space-grace

me: im so sick of stereotypical, uncreative tropes! give me something new!

any piece of media: they were best friends and their friendship saved the world :D

me, crying: oh my god they were best friends and their friendship saved the world

captainjonnitkessler

So many political posts I hate boil down to "I don't want to organize and work with people I hate and fight for small, incremental victories, I just want to start a revolution where everyone magically becomes an automaton who acts exactly the way I think they should act"

Like damn man, I want that too. Unfortunately I live in reality though so we're stuck with the first thing.

unnaturalshadow

Confused about wtf a blorbo is cause I’m not online enough so I asked my elder sibling and was told a blorbo is a character that you really like and just want to put in a situation.

And I was like oh so Grace. Grace is Eva’s blorbo. And I’ve never seen someone look so disappointed in me for being right.

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interstellarsystem

We didn't actually know plural pride day was a thing, somehow (it's every 3rd Saturday of July).

So, happy plural pride day to systems and plurals of all kinds. Systems of all origins, structures, member counts, disorders or lack thereof; you are real, you are valid, and you have a place in this world just as anyone else. People will not always be accepting, but that goes for any identity. Their perception of you does not define you or your reality.

The future is plural. Be proud.

doyoulovethewayzeylily

imagine you had a friend who constantly made jokes at the expense of something you loved. they're never funny, but they seem to expect you to laugh even though the punchline is just, "this thing you love sucks ass". it's not even really a joke, there's nothing funny about it, you can tell that they genuinely actually believe it. but they insist it's just a joke!

no matter what the situation is, they're always bringing the social interaction to a screeching halt with these jokes. nobody ever wants to participate in this joke with them. nobody agrees with the premise. nobody ever knows what to say afterwards, it's just an awkward moment and a subject change. but they just keep doing it.

you have to stop with the self-deprecatory "humor", it's not fun for anyone including you.

doyoulovethewayzeylily

#actual advice: switch to self-aggrandizing humor #have the biggest ego in the world even if it's fake #does wonders

as the smartest and most beautiful woman in the world, I can confirm this

hardgockcafe

Self aggrandizing humor saves lives. I’m an authority on this since I’m legitimately the coolest girl in the world.

#yup yup yup #I am case and point that this does work #ooh oh that trick where you go 'i'm going to commit a crime'#instead of something self-deprecating #ALSO works!

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