The Cat and the Gas

I gamely volunteered to take a brief stroll to an army surplus shop for a couple of reasons - I had a quiet Friday afternoon ahead of me, I haven't been in one of those places for years, and there's one close by me.

At least, there used to be. Castle's in Stony Stratford apparently shut down at the end of 2018, so off to Millar Tree (geddit?) in Bedford it was.

Thankfully, it was a trip that was well worth it. The shop is run by the lovely Della Wildman, who couldn't have been more helpful in confirming my initial suspicions that First World War uniforms were definitely no longer available and would be ruinously expensive to hire or have made. Secondly, 1991 Gulf War-era DPMs would be available, but extremely rare.

Perhaps unsurprisingly, the shop is flooded with Afghanistan fatigues that have changed very little in twenty years, so that's given me an idea of how the scene will go.

All in all, I do love a good bit of customer service, and felt bad leaving there without buying anything after Della had been so helpful and shown such interest in what I do, so came away with a bush hat for six of your Earth pounds. I do love a good hat.

Ahh, if only it was real... this is a poster I made for the film-within-a-film "TONE-NADO!" and featured in the film "The Witches of the Sands", directed by fellow Beyond Fury alumnus Tony Mardon. I really want to make the full film now... :-)

If I'm allowed a moan, it's that I hate breaking into the film wrappers that DVDs come in - it's fiddly, usually requiring a kitchen knife, and the wretched stuff can't be recycled - but it should be worth it as I absolutely love this film. Even Holly also appears quite interested from her perch. Top tip: never buy your cat three expensive padded beds. Instead treat yourself to a Papa John's, get mithered by said cat for a slice of said pizza, then give her the empty box and she'll sleep on that while you weep at the thought of the money wasted on sending some crass twat in a cowboy hat into space and sadly coming back.

I'll let you know how we get on 😊

Grabbed the camera bag with my trusty 550D yesterday and headed off to Holy Trinity Church in Wolverton for a quick lunchtime snapping session, and thanks to the changeable weather, I got a distinct Hammer Films vibe.

In my head, I suppose it looks a bit like Bray Studios, which remains best known for its association with Hammer Film Productions. It's also like a location or matte painting which you would find in one of their films - not that I've seen many, big scaredy-cat that I am.

According to my vague diggings, the old medieval building was replaced by a new church in the early 19th-century, with the new church incorporating the 14th-century central tower, but re-cased in new masonry. Its style is described as "Gothic Revival". Despite not being particularly tall, it's quite imposing.

There's nothing much scary about this place in real life though, especially when the sun comes out. There's even a small fairy garden carved into the trunk of a tree.

The grounds aren't large either and most people could easily walk around the whole place in just a few minutes. It's nestled in what used to be Old Wolverton, most of which has disappeared over the centuries.

As well as the filmmaking side of things, another point of local interest for me is the Grand Union Canal, which runs close by. The Warwickshire stonework for the 19th-century renovations to the church were brought in from Attleborough by barge on - you guessed it - the Grand Union, which was new at the time.

It was only a quick visit and I'm sure I'll be back at some point in the future, perhaps as a part of a film crew, but until then, here's some links to the places I scoured for my (ahem) encyclopaedic knowledge.

Keep safe...!

http://saint-george.org.uk/

https://www.british-history.ac.uk/vch/bucks/vol4/pp505-509

If you've ever done any filmmaking at any level, especially in the UK, you'll know that a sad chunk of it ends up in the bin. There are many reasons for this - technical difficulties, the restraints of time and money, logistical difficulties, inexperience, waning enthusiasm, adverse weather and sometimes just plain ol' bad luck. Whatever the reason, it's a sad fact of filming life that I've seen and experienced, but - as I've found out over the years - nine times out of ten, it gets done in the end.

So what's the recipe? Is there one secret ingredient that I can boil it down to...? I'll try and answer that here, but first, here's a little background.

My friend KC Thiruvelcham once described us as "sets addicts" - meaning we love being on film sets and contributing in any way that we can, even if that's not in our preferred roles. I finally got back on set for the first time since filming on Beyond Fury wrapped one very cold and wet November night in 2018 for Tony Mardon's upcoming film "The Witches of the Sands", and absolutely brilliant it was too. Obviously Covid-19 has had a severe impact on filming across the world, but particularly in the UK, where the pandemic has been hideously mishandled by our idiotic enrich-your-mates-and-fuck-the-plebs government, but I'm pleased to say that Tony and our location, the Playhouse Theatre in Whitstable, had put in place a robust system involving Test & Trace, rapid antigen test reports before, during and after the shoot, temperature checks, mask-wearing and ventilation throughout. It was a system that puts other organisations that I won't name to shame.

Anyway, the incredibly ambitious shooting schedule went very well, with three crews filming simultaneously at one stage. In between happily gophering around for the main unit I managed to fire off a load of behind-the-scenes photos, make friends with some great new guys, briefly catch up with Beyond Fury alumna and modern-day scream queen Dani Thompson, as well as get some shots of 80s eye-popper Linzi Drew. She's from Bristol, y'know.

I'll leave off the context by saying that while it was great to get back on set again, I realised that the thing I've missed most was that sense of everyone pulling together. With so many people working simultaneously in a restricted environment, I've seen shoots collapse into infighting, but that just didn't happen - and there wasn't even a sniff of it happening. I've wondered about this; was it luck that got us through? Professionalism? Sheer bloody-mindedness, perhaps...?

The answer is that it was a combination of all three - in measured doses. A little drop of luck, a big piece of professionalism, and a hefty glob of goodwill. That's the secret recipe to getting a film made.

So congratulations to everyone involved, and roll on next Saturday. Here come The Witches of the Sands. Pass me the cookbook.

It had to happen, really - you can't be a lifelong Doctor Who fan who does motion graphics and music for a living and not at least try and make your own version of the iconic title sequence and theme tune. So here it is:

And here's the link to the YouTube video, which gives you the option of watching in 4K as opposed to the 1080p video here - and boosts my channel a little bit ;-)

https://youtu.be/s0fqP4z-rAk

So there we go. It took a bit longer than I had hoped, but thanks to the cooperation of the wonderful Jon Campling (yes, the Death Eater from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows who stops the train - hence the title), I got there in the end.

I'm going to post again about the making of the theme and title sequence a bit later this week, but for now, enjoy.

See this thing…? It’s a clapperboard. Granted, it’s just about the nastiest chunk of old shit you can get as a clapperboard, and I’ve had it for the best part of twenty years – but I wouldn’t want to be without it.

The reason…? You should always “mark” (ie, clap) your scenes when filming for two main reasons. The first is having a sync point for your sound. Even in these days of automatic synchronising in Premiere and Final Cut Pro, it can still fail, and not having a nice obvious visual and audio snap to manually synchronise picture and sound is a total nightmare.

The second reason is that the writing on the board (also referred to as a slate, as that’s what the earliest ones were made of) tells the editor exactly what the scene is of. Nearly all forms of video production are shot out of order, so this simple reference tool helps you to know when and where you are in the story when it comes to the edit.

As an addition to the above point, you can use Premiere’s “Set Poster Frame” function to set the thumbnail to be of the slate, so you can tell at a glance which clip you want to use next.

And there’s another reason – those black and white chevrons on the snappy bit of the board, which are technically known as the sticks. These days, the modern whiteboard style clappers have coloured chevrons as well as the black and white, and these help you when you’re colour grading. Put one of these at the beginning of your shot (or, if this isn’t possible, add it at the end of the shot – this is known as an “end board”) and you’ll always have something in the shot to match colours with.

Useful little things, aren’t they…?

A few quick tips for using them – add it to the beginning of the shot once the cameras and sound are rolling, otherwise the clap is useless. Try reading out the information written on it for the editor as well – for example, “Car Chase, Scene One, Take One”, and then call “Mark!” before bringing the sticks together.

Oh, and even though you do want a nice clean snap, don’t put the board too close to a subject’s face – you might know what you’re doing and why, but they probably don’t…!

So there we have it – the humble clapperboard. Bet you didn’t know they were so helpful, did you…? Get out there and grab yourself one now – trust me, you won’t regret it…!

Okay, okay, this isn't exactly a filmmaking post...

...but never mind. It's my blog and I'll boat if I want to, boat if I want to, etc etc.

Recently my friends came into a boat which was practically being given away by a neighbour who has bought a new one. It's a 20-foot GRP (fibreglass to the rest of the world) cruiser with an ancient outboard motor and nicely fits the bill for something we've all been quietly hankering after for ages; a no-frills boat that we can take for quick cruises, mainly to the pubs on the Grand Union.

Why then, when we all have our own canal boats, would we want another one...? Well, as wonderful as cruising the cut is, it can be a bit of a full-on mission. It's a two-person job at the best of times tying and untying sixty feet of steel, as well as navigating the tight bridges on the GU. Then there's the preparation, which involves dismantling chimneys, satellite dishes, aerials and canopies. That's a lot of work if you just want to cruise to a local pub, and let's not forget that we're effectively moving our homes - it's often quicker to walk.

So, along came the chance to scoop up this little cruiser and my friends didn't hold back. We all contributed to cleaning her up, getting the engine running and stocking it up with beverages, and then we were off - just like that.

Just ten minutes into our maiden voyage we had a sticky moment when we overheated, but after half an hour of waiting the engine had sufficiently cooled and we were off again, this time running at barely tickover speed - which is still the same speed as a normal canal boat. This was the life.

And what a bunch of yobbos we were. Suddenly freed of the constraints of concentration - this thing turns on a sixpence - we were unleashed on the cut, lager cracked and Bluetooth speakers blaring.

That's a bit of an exaggeration. We all live on the water and love it, and we certainly wouldn't want to spoil it for any of our fellow boaters, so we were quiet and respectful when passing other boats and pedestrians. It was only on the quiet stretches that we opened the taps a little bit. We all had a drive of our little bargain bumper car, did a bridge each and there were no squeaks, scrapes or scratches to report. A few disapproving looks from the steel brigade who snootily have no idea we have three floating homes and twelve years' experience between us, but fuck 'em - I'm not going to be judged by anyone who sups Pimms instead of lager.

So is there a way that I can tenuously relate this post to filmmaking...? Well, actually there is. You see, while we were cruising along, the thought kept flashing through my mind that boats have featured in some great movie chases. Think about it - the Bond films are a great example of this. Moonraker has two great boat chases in it, and much of Live and Let Die takes place on the water, while The World Is Not Enough opens with a chase on the Thames. Ours will never be jumping onto the grass outside the Millennium Dome, but I can dream.

Let's not forget that the water also makes a pretty intimidating place to film as well - just think about the Jaws films. Probably not best to dwell on the Orca sinking, mind.

I'll finish by saying that a really great time was had by all. Everyone should have a go on the water - I'd go as far as to say it's a lifechanging experience. Just think "Moonraker" while going along - it's viewed with terrible snobbery, but really it's just great, harmless fun.

Keep safe, happy boating.

It’s a misnomer, but you need it - lots of it

What is room tone? Why is it a misnomer? And why is it so important…?

The answers to the first two questions are quite straightforward; firstly, room tone refers to the ambient sound of a location. Secondly, it’s a bit of a misnomer as not every location is an interior room, of course, so for this reason it’s also referred to - more correctly - as wild track.

The third question is a little harder to answer, but here goes: you need room tone, and plenty of it, to make the sound design of your edit as smooth as possible. When you make cuts to a clip and splice others into it, you can create jarring jumps in the background sound, so it makes sense to have a constant stream of clean wild track, or room tone, to smooth over the joins.

Technically, the wild track sits below your dialogue clips (and sound effects, should there be any), but above any music tracks.

Remember the video of Rich bowling from the previous post...?

In order to get the shots I wanted, I had to reposition the camera and film from a different angle. You could probably hear the difference that made to the background sound.

Here’s the solution - a large audio transition between the two clips with the wild track mixed underneath to cover any gaps:

Here’s the finished video:

One final thing to say: you need absolute silence from the crew when recording them, plus I’m going to stick my neck out and say that you need at least one full minute of wild track of every location you record in. Don’t be afraid to stand your ground, as wild track and room tone will become invaluable to you in the future.