swag masta from doncasta

what has four legs? a table! haha, i love to have fun

Beautiful madness

THIS HAS GONE TOO FAR AND NOT FAR ENOUGH AT THE SAME DAMN TIME!!!

GIVE THEM KIDS A BUDGET

Do you ever wonder how many stories have been told about you? I don’t mean rumors or gossip. A story like “ one time I was at the mall and this girl dropped her hotdog but she picked it up and ate it” what if I’m that girl??how many times have people seen me do something I thought no one saw and is now being used as an ice breaker at a family dinner? Hmmmmmm?!???!

one time i was in this historical park in new york and i was climbing a tree in order to get a good photo and i fell out just as a family was walking past…two years later i ran into the mom at stop&shop and she gasped and said “oh my god, tree girl?” and i’ve never been the same since

Finally, a doctor we can trust.

I fucking hate it when you’re in such a fantastically giddy mood and then you see one simple little thing that makes you think, “oh” and then you just get this empty feeling in your chest and you get nauseous and the world just crumbles and you want to just lay under a blanket and close your eyes and fall asleep and never wake up. 

this was one of the accounts linked to the ira i’m gonna SCREAM

This post singlehandedly influenced the election

declaring “this is the bad place” every time you are even slightly inconvenienced is peak humor

remember that time they legit tried to have a gritty loony tunes reboot

this can’t be real

update: she couldn’t answer me because was still banging the girl

I wish this wasn’t so glaringly fake cause it would be kinda funny if it were real but its not real so its not funny and I’m being redundant for the purpose of conveying shut the fuck up and don’t make up bullshit for notes

THE POST GOT BETTER

every time i see this i sit and read the whole thing bc it just makes me laugh. every time

finding out that my fists can be injured when punching things was a very jarring moment in my life. how can these weapons of destruction be destroyed themselves in their use? how can these hands… catch themselves…