My god makes mistakes. My god gives the right blessings to the wrong people. My god sometimes keeps quiet when he sees injustice. My god pretends not to listen to my pleas. My god refuses to let anyone see him. My god is not always right. My god does not makes the right choices. My god sometimes lets bad people roam the earth free. My god lets the good people suffer. Why?
Maybe because, my god is not an all-powerful, all-knowing being. Maybe he is human, just like me and next person. My god makes mistakes, and then he gives himself a chance to correct them, asks for help to correct them. Be it Shiv asking Vishnu to preserve the universe, because he gave the wrong asur a boon. Be it the gods asking Parvati to help defeat Mahisasur, because they gave him a boon. Maybe, this is what makes my god so godly. He asks for help, something we can't do. He accepts his mistakes, something we can't do. He forgives, something we can't do. He speaks up when he must, something we can't. He defends, protects when he must, something we can't do.
I believe in God. Because, my god is the one who broke his promise to help five brothers win a war for righteousness, my god is the one who kept his promise and saved a woman's honour in front a court full of men, when her husbands failed to protect her honour. My god is the one who gave a person a hundred chances to correct himself, but sheathed his head the moment he made the same mistake one-hundred-and-one-nth time. And, my god is the same one who took a form only to feel a mother's undying love. My god is the same one who refused heaven without his wife. My god is the same one who cried rivers helplessly when his wife was abducted. My god is the same one who selflessly adhered to his father's orders and left for exile. My god is the same one who became deaf to his mother's weeps and left his throne. My god is the same one who walked down the path of Shabri's hut, ate her half-eaten fruits, with delight. My god is the same one who gave his friend who fed him rice with devotion, his whole palace. My god is kind.
My god doesn't promise me a stormless sea, he promises me an unsinkable ship. He doesn't answer my prayers right away, but he also doesn't punish me for my sins right away. He gives the bad people a chance, but he also tests the good and pious ones. That is why I believe in my god. My god doesn't promise me eternal happiness, he promises me unshakable will. My god doesn't vanquish all that is bad and evil, instead he preserves the good, because he knows, utopia is a myth. My god does not promise me heaven if I live right, nor does he banishes me to hell when I sin. Instead, he gives me a chance to correct my wrongs over millions of births, and finally gives me a place at his abode when he deems me worthy.
Maybe this is why, I love my God, I do not fear him. I do not fear what will happen to me if I sin, because I know, he will give me a chance to correct me. But, I also know that he won't keep quiet if he sees me repeatedly do wrong. My god doesn't ask me to worship him all day, my god asks me to do what I must, and remember him while doing so. My god doesn't ask me to give all that I own to him, he only asks for my ultimate devotion. And that is why, he is my god, my anchor, the one who fights battles for me I don't even know about, the one who helps to fight my sorrows, the one who only asks me to do what i must, and leave the rest to him, the one who carries my world on his shoulder.
And as the story goes, he will come when he must. He will show himself to me when he must. He will give me what I want when he must, he will punish me when he must. But, I know, he will always love me, he will always comfort me, he will always anchor me when all goes wrong. He will always look after me when no one else can. He will always fight with the world for me. He will always forgive me, when the world even refuses to look at me. And that is exactly why, he is my god, my savior, my friend, not someone I fear, but someone I love.
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immediately after an interaction: i have GOT to get more normal oh god i need to get more normal immediately i have to get more normal or they're going to hunt me down they're going to hunt me down and flay me for sport
during an interaction: and why not put a little spin on it? why not add some conversational zest?
listen to me, this is so so important: you've gotta get used to really giving it your 60% as a default. like don't half-ass it necessarily but try not to go over 70% or so of an ass. you'll feel better and live a happier more fulfilled life, and on the rare occasions where you do need to lock the fuck in you'll be able to pull off bullshit that the sad miserable wretches giving it their 100% can never dream of, because they're busy draining themselves dry and you have energy reserves to spare.
occasionally, you will discover an artist who drew roughly 300 beautiful pictures of your favorite characters over the course of a month and then never touched them again. you must accept this as a gift.
I find it so interesting that time and time again Jun Wu never considered other peoples kindness and how that foiled all his plans.
Like originally he wanted Xie Lian to fall apart and break like him but Wu Ming was there to be sure he wasn’t alone and to take on all that resentment.
The man with the bamboo hat was there making sure Xie Lian remember that people can be kind.
Like even 800 years later after Jun Wu failed he tries to cause rifts for Xie Lian so that he has no one and becomes isolated and hopefully insane like him.
Except Pei Ming who would have lied and manipulated the situation doesn’t blame Xie Lian for figuring everything out, he knows it wasn’t personal and he’s able to work with him later despite Jun Wu constantly pitting them against each other.
Shi Wudu is the strongest elemental master and while he didn’t ever warm to Xie Lian, Shi Qingxuan did and they loved him for who he was. They always came to Xie Lian defence to give him backing in heaven because they were friends. (Which honestly might be why the Shi Wudu plot was revealed starting the Black Water Arc.) then even after leaving heaven and Xie Lian losing a popular gods backing. Shi Qingxuan is kind and doesn’t hold a grudge and even when they have nothing and can’t be an ally in heaven they still care about Xie Lian and help him when they are literally crippled and mortal.
Ling Wen is shrewd and could have been a very strong antagonist against Xie Lian except he was always polite and kind to her and she respects that. She has no real desire to do him harm outside of protecting herself and doesn’t really consider him an enemy in any way.
Lang Qianqiu should have turned against him and all of the heavens against too except he only wants the truth. He hears the whole story and immediately clears Xie Lians name and makes sure the heavens know it was Qi Rong so Xie Lian can’t be banished again.
He pairs Xie Lian with Quan Yizhen a god known for being confrontational and picking fights except Xie Lian was kind to him and that makes him a for lifer in Quan Yizhen’s mind he literally wouldn’t turn against him or even think about it because Xie Lian proved himself to be a good person and that’s all Quan Yizhen needs to like you.
Yushi Huang happily tried to help Xie Lian with the drought and gives him her spiritual device as a show of kindness. Then she helps him hide Banyue, helps in Tonglu and helps Hua Cheng infiltrate Heaven because she’s a kind woman who gave up her life for her people and understands Xie Lian is the same.
Jun Wu assumes this whole time that Feng Xin and Mu Qing would be resentful because that’s what happened to him with his friends except Feng Xin and Mu Qing are insane and deranged and just want Xie Lian to be their friend again so they make little disguises to help all the time and take some of the scrutiny of Xie Lian because they were there too. Feng Xin pays of Xie Lians huge debt to smooth things over for him with the other Gods. When Xie Lian is “kidnapped” they follow him to get him back immediately because hey wait that’s our friend. Jun Wu tries to bring suspicion between them by making them assume the worst about each other but Mu Qing literally takes a shackle over betrayal. Then both of them go to Mount Tonglu to protect Xie Lian and begin to mend their friendship because that’s how they roll.
And of course we have Hua Cheng who is Wu Ming that constant loyal thorn in Jun Wu’s side because through all of these events he is with Xie Lian. He offers comfort and support and insures that Xie Lian never even begins to spiral down the same dark path by helping him in every situation, acting as a buffer and a confidant and reminding Xie Lian he isn’t alone and he will be there loving Xie Lian more than Jun Wu could ever hate him.
There’s probably more instances but I just love how this all kinda plays out like yes Xie Lian is truly kind and hopeful and that’s why he’ll never fully be Bai Wuxiang anyway but other people are kind too! There is so much more to people than Jun Wu expects and that’s why his plan is foiled over and over again. Not by smarts or by fighting but by simple human kindness and compassion.
Do you think Xie Lian does that thing the old man do where they have their hands clasped behind his back for support as he walk and look around? Because I sure do.
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It took me a long time to believe in myself, and I still struggle sometimes in certain areas of life. But having that belief, that trust and confidence in yourself, can truly make a huge difference in your outlook and what you do in life! You don't have to be be unrealistically confident in things. But being able to move forward without self-criticism or doubts stopping you is huge, and you deserve that!
tragically project hail mary was grown in a test tube for me specifically like. woman who fucking did all that and history will call her a villain but there will be history books to do so and that is her victory. scruffiest man alive who cries constantly and can't keep his glasses on to save his life and who is so so scared. the alien who is on its species' very first space exploration mission and who is so so alone and reaching out to the completely unknown life just for any chance that it won't be, anymore. and everything is ending but we still stop and gaze in awe at these beautiful, terrible things that are killing us. and we never call them evil.
Sometimes we’re unsatisfied with a thing we made because when it only existed in our head, we saw all the things it could have been and when it’s done we know all the things that it isn’t, but we can’t see the way it expands into a million new things when someone else unpacks it in their head.
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"I'll figure it out" is a powerful statement. Yes, you may not know what to do next or where to even begin... but you are ready and willing to do what it takes. You will in fact figure it out.
escaping. always escaping. @kimbapeukidding - Tumblr Blog | Tumlook
